Bimbette #1: I don’t want to grow up. The real world is scary.
Bimbette #2: Yeah… Puberty sucks.
Bimbette #1: Ummm, I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty sure puberty is done when you’re, like, fifteen. We’re 18 now…
Bimbette #2: Oh. Well, maybe I’m a late bloomer.
–UES
Overheard by: Allie
Chick: I was in the Peace Corps down there.
Woman: Oh, I didn’t know that.
Chick: Oh, sorry, not the Peace Corps; Club Med.
–Le Monde, 112th & Broadway
Mom: Look at the sea lions, buddy!
Little boy: I don’t see any lions.
Mom: Well, they’re not really lions — they’re whales, just like dolphins!
–Central Park Zoo
Overheard by: Why isn’t there birth control in the water supply?
Bus driver, upon seeing a rainbow: Out the right side there is a beautiful rainbow.
Man in the back of the bus: Michael Jackson did that! He probably starting singing “over the rainbow” and God made one appear!
–Berry & N 7th
Overheard by: Bean
Girl #1: I want to get pregnant in March. Let's get pregnant in march.
Girl #2: Wait, where are we now?
Girl #1: My uterus is ready.
Girl #2: I had a full checkup, and my uteri are great.
Girl #1: Oh my god, you have two uteruses? You are awesome! You have utters. You have yoo-utters!
Girl #2: Yeah, I have three breasts.
–Cafe near Columbia
Overheard by: DL
SAT prepping kid #1: What’s hydrolysis?
SAT prepping kid #2: Dude, don’t you play Grand Theft Auto? Hydrolysis is what makes the cars bump up and down.
SAT prepping kid #3: Um…Hydrolysis is the splitting of things in water.
SAT prepping kid #2: Whatever. Same thing.
–2 train near Borough Hall
Overheard by: Everclear
Headline by: Dave Schavone
Runners-Up:
· “Rollin’ in His H20” – JP
· “Another Roads Scholar” – Emily
· “It’s San Andreas’s Fault” – boods
Honorable mentions:
· “Only Aquaman Knows For Sure” – Sara Swank
· “Putting the “Dense” in Reverse Condensation” – Elan
· “The Sad Part Is, They All Got Into Brown” – Betsy
· “They Had Their Ups and Downs, then Splitsville” – Steven Foster
· “He Learns By Osmosis” – melissa coubrough
Girl: …but it’s not like you have to be really religious to be a nun anyway, right?
–Clara Barton High, Crown Heights
Guy #1: Yo, check out my new hat.
Guy #2: Pffff…shit man, I had a new hat yesterday.
–Grand St & Bushwick, Brooklyn
Construction Worker: So is Camel Toe the same as Hammer Time?
–Pace University
Overheard by: Lil
Boy, 7: Daddy, I wanna see the Empire State Building.
Father: Sorry, son. That’s way uptown and we’re headed downtown.
–48th & Broadway
Overheard by: Christopher Mignemi
