Guy #1: Yeah, she's hot and a violent kisser, but her twin sister is so needy.
Guy #2: Needy how?
Guy #1: She's all like, “But we share everything!”
Guy #2: Fuck you, dude. Fuck you.
–W 10th & Hudson
Guy #1: Yeah, she's hot and a violent kisser, but her twin sister is so needy.
Guy #2: Needy how?
Guy #1: She's all like, “But we share everything!”
Guy #2: Fuck you, dude. Fuck you.
–W 10th & Hudson
20-something on cell: So yeah, I hit a new low. So you know how I had sex with Dan, Steve and Dave? Well, I totally just handled my friend from work who is married and we did it in his daughter's bed. If that doesnt say I'm crazy, I dont know what does? (pause) Are you kidding me? His wife never gives it up, that man busted four times in a matter of minutes.
(pause). Well, that's now four men this week who said I have the best pussy they've had.
–159th & Broadway
Overheard by: morgan
Girl: She was fucking everybody in this city–and no one even liked her!
–Houston & Lafayette
Overheard by: bRonwyn
20-something man to girlfriend: You're a grown woman! I can't help it if you're a whore!
–7 Train
Overheard by: becky z-dub
Girl on cell: Wait, so you and Skylar are dating now? Ahh, so exciting! (pause) No, you didn't already tell me. You said that you woke up next to him. Since when does that mean you're dating someone?
–Bedford & 8th
20-something blonde on phone: All those people who laugh and snigger at you only do it because they too have experienced the walk of shame.
–Christopher & Bleecker
Man on phone: I can't be constantly wondering who you're sleeping with! I tell you, I'm tired, I'm old, and I can't do what I'm supposed to do. I'm a good 60, but I ain't good enough to be waking up everyday and chasing you around!
–Coffee shop, Crown Heights
Overheard by: Eric
Hipster on cell: I don't see what's so wrong with going up to someone on the street and saying, "hey, what's up? Let's fuck!" I do it all the time!
–Great Hall, Cooper Union
Overheard by: NYUTSOA12
20-something #1: Oh my god! I can't believe you had sex with two guys on the same night! Not even I've done that!
20-something #2: Yes you have!
20-something #1: Oh yeah…but they were at the same time so it doesn't count.
–Upper East Side
Elderly woman sipping wine: Three girls and one guy? Sounds like a good time!
–Queens
Overheard by: amused cashier
Dude on cell: Hey bro, whatcha doing? Oh, yeah? What about your friend, does he like doing that? Does he like it a lot? Do you think I can come over? Well, then we can all do that together, a lot. (sees people looking at him) I'll talk to you later, bro.
–Church St Post Office
Overheard by: deshaunicus
Serious girl: And then they asked for a three-way, but a tasteful one.
–15th St & 5th Ave
Middle aged woman to friend: I just got this bike seat but I have to return it. I was riding around on it yesterday and when I woke up this morning, I felt like I'd been gang-banged by the Pittsburgh Steelers.
–Bike Shop, 12th St & Ave B
20-something chick: I am *so* over threesomes. There's just too much going on!
–Weight Room, Coles Gym
Overheard by: M.F.
White chick in sundress: I'm too naive for their kind of orgies.
–Dallas BBQ, 165th & Broadway
Overheard by: Ladle
Drunk guy at bar: I have to pee, but first I have one word for you: threesome.
–Crocodile Lounge
Guy on cell: I'm at the corner of West 4th Street and West 12th Street. Which sounds completely ridiculous, I know.
–Outside Cubbyhole
Girl on cell with boyfriend: Yeah, we got lost… We're somewhere in Yonkers.
–Bleecker & W 10th St
Loud tourist on cell: I'm in Rockefeller Plaza. Just look for a guy with a Starbucks cup.
–Rockefeller Plaza
Overheard by: linda
Blonde on cell: Yeah, I'm in the 'hood.
–SoHo
Overheard by: Ladle
Woman on cell, directing friend to find her: Do you see a really tall man holding an umbrella up high? I'm near a really tall man holding an umbrella. …he's very attractive.
–Concert on The Great Lawn
Overheard by: sternie
Suit on cell: Unfortunately I'm in the Financial District right now… Man, I wanna come up there and make love to both of you.
–Financial District
Ghetto boy: Wait, you two had a threesome?
Ghetto girl #1: It was mad awkward, yo!
Ghetto girl #2: Fo’ reals!
–Atlantic & Hoyt
Slutty lesbian: Did you tell Ebony that we wanted to have a threesome with her?
Skinny queer: Who is Abony?
Slutty lesbian: Did you tell Ebony we were going to have a threesome?
Skinny queer: Abony?! … Oh, Ebony.
–Bodega, 13th & 6th
Black girl: Antoine got married, I heard.
Black dude: Yo, his wife is that bitch we menage à trois-ed, like, last year. He knew what we did to that girl, and he still married her and had a kid with her.
Black girl: That’s crazy.
Black dude: See this Swiss cheese? We put holes in that girl.
–Blimpie, 23rd & 6th
Girl to friends: Yeah, I heard she had a threesome and then kicked him in the face.
–Taste of China
Hot blonde: We’ve shared way too much of too many men.
–140th & Broadway
Overheard by: Ladle
Italian guy on cell: Okay, if twins have a threesome, is it incest or masturbation? Well, I think they should cancel each other out, so that makes it okay, right? So should I ask her, then?
–96th & 3rd
Overheard by: Haggs
20-ish guy: Just think of that: two niggas and three bitches. That’s a ménage and a half, son.
–A train
Chick on cell: Awww, we missed the gang bang! … I had a bagel for dinner.
–113th & Broadway
Overheard by: McNasty
Queer #1: I wish Dennis would call me back… I really liked him, and I thought he liked me, too.
Queer #2: Of course he’s not going to call you! You met when you were in bed with him and his best friend!
–Central Park
