Drunk woman: Oh, look at this girl. I love her dress!
Guy: That dress is birth control.
–Prince & Greene
Overheard by: Andrew
Drunk woman: Oh, look at this girl. I love her dress!
Guy: That dress is birth control.
–Prince & Greene
Overheard by: Andrew
Teen girl: You know, relationships are a lot like the British government. The queen thinks she’s in charge, but the prime minister has all the power.
Teen boy: I wonder if people in the real world are subjected to this kind of conversation.
–Stuyvesant High School, Chambers Street
Tourist dad: Look, Alexander Hamilton.
Tourist son: He was young.
Tourist dad: Yeah, wonder what he died of?
–Rector St, by Trinity Graveyard
Overheard by: DTA Officer
Pre-dad: That fuckin’ thing is getting ready to pop out next week.
–Fulton between Broadway & Center
Guy: Hey, my brothers are in town.
Girl: Hey! Looks like there will be a whole set of teeth in the house!
Guy: You're a bitch.
–Wall St
Overheard by: Emily
Street performer: I declare today the “Eat Vegetables and Dance Day”!
Tourist to son: See, I told you all New Yorkers are crazy and high.
–South Street Seaport
Headline by: AlpacaHoss
Runners-Up:
· “As a Perfectly Sane Dance-Eater, I Take Exception to That Remark” – Upstanding New Yorker
· “Does She Mean the People or the Rent Payments?” – Uncle Bling
· “Now Lettuce Boogie Out Of Town” – Kevin Babbles
· “Now Let´s Go to McDonald’s, and I’d Better Not See Those Hips Shaking” – Laura
· “Now Stop Dancing and Eat This Bacon” – Jesse
· “Richard Simmons Tries to Restart His Career” – sweatin to the oldies
· “What and Break My Perfect Morbidly Obese Record?” – Nota Fatty
· “You Laugh Until You Realize That New Yorkers Get the Day Off From Work” – BabakganoosH
Pretty 20-something girl #1: No, he's not like mentally retarded, More like physically retarded.
Pretty 20-something girl #2: Oh, like my toe.
Pretty 20-something girl #1: Exactly.
–Wall Street
Tourist mom: The last thing I wanted was to be drunk in front of my children.
Son: Too late.
–Embassy Suites, near WTC
Overheard by: Shanaca
Guy: You don't understand–it doesn't have to be well-written, there doesn't need to be a good plot… It's *porn*!
Woman: No, you're missing my point. If the plot, writing, and characters don't matter, why have them at all? Why not just the sex?
Guy: Oh… That's a really good question, actually.
Woman: But all the inefficient parts are still there, so there's obviously a market value for them.
Guy: Only that they keep me from feeling like a total perv.
–Broad St & Beaver
Broker guy: So did you go to Moran’s last night?
Trader guy: Nah, can’t get these guys to go there. They keep trying to drag me to Light.
Broker guy: Oh yeah, you don’t like the place?
Trader guy: Nah, every time I go there I feel like I gotta check my testicles at the door.
–American Stock Exchange, Trinity Street
Overheard by: Dermot Lynch
