Girl on cell: Hey, where are you?
Chorus of old Hispanic men, in unison: I'm right here, baby!
–Lorimer Street, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Holly
Girl on cell: Hey, where are you?
Chorus of old Hispanic men, in unison: I'm right here, baby!
–Lorimer Street, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Holly
Chick on cell: It's all about the eyeball lick. Tell her.
–59th St & 9th Ave
Overheard by: aenigma
NYPD cop: I would rather lick the street than ever smell your fart again.
–Forsyth St & E Houston St
Overheard by: Dave-o
Teen girl to friends: He's so gross! Seriously, I'd rather lick my cat's asshole than hook up with that guy!
–Barnes & Noble, Bayside
Guy at bar to friend: I can't believe you married a woman who won't lick your asshole.
–Ale House, MacDougal St
Random woman: Why do you always insist on licking my elbow?
–86th & 3rd
Overheard by: Jana
Queer #1: So, what do you want to do tonight?
Queer #2: I don't know, what do you want to do?
Queer #1: I want to have sex tonight!
Queer #2: You want to have sex with me!
Queer #1: No, with a stranger!
Queer #2: Well…we could put a brown bag over my head!
–17th & 7th Cafeteria
Guy: So I thought I’d get married before I go.
Girl: You’re getting married?
Guy: Yeah, to some chick.
–1st between 7th & 8th
Overheard by: Kira
Three-year-old boy: One of my friends died.
Mom: Wait — what?!
Three-year-old boy: Yeah, one of my best friends died in a car crash when your friend died in a car crash.
Mom: Huh?
Three-year-old boy: Yes, we were flying in a plane and suddenly another plane came from behind and crashed into us. I ran away, but she got hurt. And died.
Mom: What? Huh?
Three-year-old boy: I’ll tell you more later… These trains have ears.
–6 train
Overheard by: impressed with todays youth
Teen #1: Are we there yet?
Teen #2: It's right over there.
Teen #3 (screaming): I see it! I see Atlas! It's white, I see it.
Bus driver: Yeah, and I see dead people across the street…you don't hear me screaming.
–Q29 Bus, Atlas Park Mall
Punk teen #1: So, was he molested?
Punk teen #2: No.
Punk teen #1: Oh, thats boring.
–LIRR
Guy #1: You know that video with the guys and the elephants with the butt sex?
Guy #2: Yeah, that must hurt. What about the one with the black guys?
Guy #1: Oh, the one with the BJs?
(later)
Guy #2: When I was younger I used to masturbate with my friend. We would put a pillow between us and jack off.
–B1 Bus
Man on phone: Come down the road and I'm the first house that you do not see.
–Office Building, W 46th St
Overheard by: TheGreenCat
Black woman on cell: Don't fuck in ma house!
–Union Square Station
10-year-old boy to another: Yeah, my mom says I can fuck a girl in her house, as long as she ain't a skanky-ass ho.
–105th & Broadway
Overheard by: Andy
Girl to friend: We can't hang out at my house. I don't know anyone there anymore.
–125th & Broadway
Overheard by: EthanK
Guy cycling past very fast, to cycling companion: So he bought a whole house just to store pot?
–Prospect Park, Brooklyn
Overheard by: peeper
City cop to two homeless guys: If your house is worth like $200,000, you can probably only get a equity loan for like $100,000. (homeless guys nod their heads in agreement)
–Madison Square Park
Overheard by: E
