Professor guy: I’m sure all of you have seen a photo of Babe Ruth and would be able to recognize him. his autograph is worth almost as much as Abraham Lincoln’s is.
Swedish girl #1: I don’t know what a Babe Ruth is?
Swedish girl #2: Oh, he’s a famous baby.
–New School University, 13th & 5th
Overprivileged yuppie #1: Did you see that? Dude, did you *see* that?! Man, I *own* this fucking city!
Overprivileged yuppie #2: No you don't, skizzball. Donald Trump owns this fucking city.
Overprivileged yuppie #1: Donald Trump can suck my dick!
–85th & 2nd
Overheard by: SoOverIt
(tiny Asian girl in a striped skirt and high-heeled boots is hauling a suitcase up the stairs from the subway).
Hobo: You know who you look like?
Asian girl: Who?
Hobo: You know who you look like?
Asian girl: Who?
Hobo: Girl, you look like Paul Lynde.
–12th St & 7th Ave
Dude #1: How's your sister doing?
Dude #2: She's fine.
Dude #1: So what is it with all these lesbians looking like Justin Bieber?
–2 Train
Overheard by: DG
Chick on cell: I hope you fucking die! Die! … Well, not like now… but someday… like, when you’re eighty.. Okay, eighty-four.
–NYU
Overheard by: Kelly
Student: … And I was all, ‘Dude, don’t touch my side of the cadaver!’
–Albert Einstein College of Medicine
Overheard by: BuddyblueJD
15-year-old: Look! They’re dying because they suck!
—The Bucket List showing, AMC Empire 25
20-ish chick: After I died, I hardly did anything.
–45th & 3rd
Overheard by: mkr
Blonde to gal pals, on Heath Ledger: It just made me realize how real death is when even a celebrity can die!
–25th & 1st
Six-year-old boy: Mom, did you know that Elvis Presley died of a drug overdose?
Mom: Well, that won't ever happen to you.
Six-year-old boy, angrily: How do you know?
–Atlantic Ave Station
Overheard by: Jon Good
Queer #1: I should have known you had that one.
Queer #2: Yeah, I mean, I have every Barbra Streisand recording ever.
Queer #1: I shouldn’t have gotten that for you; it was such a stupid gift.
Queer #2: No, I’ll just sell the old one on eBay.
–1 train
Overheard by: Fatty McFingers
Straight girl: Oooohhh, you know who has the best tits? Isabella Rossellini. Great, great tits.
Gay guy: Oh, you're right! I didn't even think of her.
Straight girl: I don't know how someone her age can have tits that great.
Gay guy: Yeah, if your tits are half that good when you turn her age, you should die a happy woman.
Lesbian: Dear god, why are we talking about Isabella Rossellini's tits on the subway? For that matter, why are we talking about them anywhere?!
–N Train
Little boy: Daddy, is Michael Jackson still alive?
Father: Um…sort of.
–42nd St & Broadway
Overheard by: Sabs
Queer: You remind me of that girl Audrina on the hills!
Girl resembling Audrina: Yeah, I've heard that before. I've also heard Lindsay Lohan, but that's mostly because of my coke habit.
–Splash Bar
