Wednesday One-Liners Taste the Rainbow

Teen hipster on cell: You know, light pink is the navy blue of India. It's true! Don't ask me how I know this but I do.

–6th & 51st

Overheard by: simon

Flamboyant nasal-voiced man on cell: I'm feeling blue…like, royal blue…a little lighter…no, not baby blue…like, American flag blue…like…yeah.

–Jamaica LIRR Station

Aussie on cell: There were all these dudes wearing pink shirts…and they weren't even gay!

–55th & 8th Ave

Overheard by: wearing a pink shirt and gay

Girl to friend: So he made carrot salad and I said "Your poop is gonna be orange!"

–The Frying Pan, Chelsea

Latina: Well, she said "It wasn't white! It was yellow!" So I was like, "Well, was it at least shaped like a penis?"

–4th Ave & 40th, Brooklyn

Posted on October 1, 2008
All Wednesday One-Liners, Bars & Clubs, Brooklyn, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Clothing, Colors, Compare/Contrast, Food, Foreigners, Gays and Lesbians, Girls, Hipsters, Latinos, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Penis, Poop, Queens, Questions, Teens, Train Station, Trains Not Subway

Which May or May Not Have a Minimum Height Requirement

Old guy: I heard they have a ride for kids over there.
Ghetto guy: Are you kidding me? The only good ride you can get around here is nine chicks and one dude!

–Nostrand Ave & Ave Y, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Amber S

Posted on September 30, 2008
Brooklyn, Default, Guys, Kids, Old People, Questions, Sex, Words

Every Brilliant Idea Has a Catch

Waitress #1: Do you have any tampons?
Waitress #2: Yeah, I have regular and super.
Waitress #1: Are they the plastic kind? The cardboard snags my vagina.

–Restaurant, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Unappetized

Posted on September 30, 2008
Brooklyn, Coworkers, Default, Gender issues, Menstruation, Offers and requests, Questions, Restaurants & Cafes, Vagina, Waitresses, Weirdness

I Gag Every Time I Look at 1970's Beaver Shots

Nine-year-old girl: Are you a Republican or a Democrat?
14-year-old girl: Well, I'm a Democrat.
Nine-year-old girl: Why?
14-year-old girl: Well, in my opinion, being a Democrat means you don't like Bush.
Nine-year-old girl: Oh. I'm a Democrat, too.

–Brooklyn Public Library, Greenpoint Branch

Overheard by: Jack Jackl

Posted on September 29, 2008
Brooklyn, Default, Girls, Kids, Library, Politics, President, Questions, Teens

The Hokey Pokey Is Very Popular in New York

Boy in hat: You gotta remember, you have to squeeze the left nipple.
Girl: Ohhhhh. Of course.

–Bedford & 3rd

Overheard by: Ashley

Posted on September 27, 2008
Advice, Boys, Brooklyn, Default, Girls, Nipples, Weirdness

Suddenly Sober, Alice Put Out the Cigarette

Drunk chick: I don't care if you let me I'm smoking this fucking cigarette. (lights it)
Driver: Brunettes are slutty.
Drunk chick: What?
Driver: It's okay, I like slutty chicks.

–Taxi Cab, Williamsburg

Overheard by: where's waldo?

Posted on September 20, 2008
Brooklyn, Cabbies, Compliments, Default, Drunks, Girls, Insults, Smokers & Smoking, Smoking, Weirdness

Incidentally, Your Palm Has Never Felt Softer

Large man: You fucked him!
Large woman: I didn't fuck no one…I let him cum in my hand.
Large man: Bitch!

–Prospect Park

Overheard by: bo jokes

Posted on September 19, 2008
Body Parts, Brooklyn, Compare/Contrast, Cum, Default, Insults, Men, Women

Wednesday-One-Lina, Please!

Ghetto guy: Fuck no! That nigga's soft as cotton.

–Union Square

Black guy: Yo nigga, I called this nigga and said "Yo nigga."

–59th St & 10th Ave

Overheard by: Satch

Random old black guy sitting alone on steps: Nigga who, nigga what, nigga where, nigga what?

–2nd ave and 8th st

Overheard by: evanescent

Chinese kid to another: Do I look pussy to you, nigga?

–Sunset Park, Brooklyn

White thug on cell: What? You can't call me nigga, you're white!

–Beverley Road & Ocean Parkway

White guy to Dominican guy: Yo, you look like the kinda nigga who gets bitches. Where they at?

–11th & 3rd

Overheard by: Benny the boo

Posted on September 17, 2008
All Wednesday One-Liners, Black People, Brooklyn, Chinese, Comebacks, Compare/Contrast, Guys, Kids, Latinos, Old People, On Cell, Questions, Race, Thugs, Union Square and East Village, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center, White People, Words

Whatever Consenting Mammals May Do in the Privacy Of Their Own Stalls

Man #1: How about Jack the Horse?
Man #2: Jack the horse. Wait, Jack the Horse?
Man #1: Uhhhh…
Man #2: Jack like the verb? No way dude, not eating there.

–Jack the Horse Restaurant, Brooklyn Heights

Overheard by: avoid the hollandaise sauce

Posted on September 14, 2008
Animals & Nature, Brooklyn, Default, Food, Men, Questions, Restaurants & Cafes, Stupidity, Words

Why They're Not Allowed to Play Real Baseball Anymore

(during a game of wiffleball)
Guy #1: Dammit, Scott hit the fucking ball!
Guy #2: Shut up, Dave! Why are you so fucking fat?!
Guy #1: I'm fat? Well, why do you still have an incurable shitting disease?
Guy #2: Because it's incurable…dick!

–Tillary St, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Dan Fuckin' Murphy

Posted on September 13, 2008
Brooklyn, Default, Diet/Weight, Guys, Health and Hygiene, Insults, Poop, Questions, Weirdness