Large man: You fucked him!
Large woman: I didn't fuck no one…I let him cum in my hand.
Large man: Bitch!
–Prospect Park
Overheard by: bo jokes
Large man: You fucked him!
Large woman: I didn't fuck no one…I let him cum in my hand.
Large man: Bitch!
–Prospect Park
Overheard by: bo jokes
Ghetto guy: Fuck no! That nigga's soft as cotton.
–Union Square
Black guy: Yo nigga, I called this nigga and said "Yo nigga."
–59th St & 10th Ave
Overheard by: Satch
Random old black guy sitting alone on steps: Nigga who, nigga what, nigga where, nigga what?
–2nd ave and 8th st
Overheard by: evanescent
Chinese kid to another: Do I look pussy to you, nigga?
–Sunset Park, Brooklyn
White thug on cell: What? You can't call me nigga, you're white!
–Beverley Road & Ocean Parkway
White guy to Dominican guy: Yo, you look like the kinda nigga who gets bitches. Where they at?
–11th & 3rd
Overheard by: Benny the boo
Man #1: How about Jack the Horse?
Man #2: Jack the horse. Wait, Jack the Horse?
Man #1: Uhhhh…
Man #2: Jack like the verb? No way dude, not eating there.
–Jack the Horse Restaurant, Brooklyn Heights
Overheard by: avoid the hollandaise sauce
(during a game of wiffleball)
Guy #1: Dammit, Scott hit the fucking ball!
Guy #2: Shut up, Dave! Why are you so fucking fat?!
Guy #1: I'm fat? Well, why do you still have an incurable shitting disease?
Guy #2: Because it's incurable…dick!
–Tillary St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Dan Fuckin' Murphy
Little kid looking out subway window: Look mom! The projects!
–N Train
Overheard by: patricia
Three-year-old girl to mom looking at a painting: Why am I so biiiggggg?
–Brooklyn Museum
Overheard by: alison
Little boy, whining to his mother while following her the wrong way through IKEA: We're never going to get out of here!
–IKEA, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Lost In Space
Small child: Look at that pigeon, mommy, I want to eat it!
–Central Park
Overheard by: Natalie
Two-year-old girl (shaking her ass): Hubba hubba!
–Central Park
Little boy: Mommy! Let's go look at the hos now!
–Museum of Natural History, Native American Exhibit
Pudgy Asian kid standing in circle of sitting summer campers: The capital of Thailand is Bangkok! Who wants a tea bag?
–Brooklyn College
Overheard by: Thaibag
Drunk dude getting restrained: No, you don't understand. I could murder anyone! Not like my family. My family's all pussies… They're all Ricky Martin!
–Outside Nightcaps, Midwood
Dreadlocked lesbian: I can feel in my heart of hearts that you'll be okay, baby. You didn't kill anybody, you paid a guy to kill somebody.
–Lesbian Bar, Park Slope
Overheard by: gvw
Elderly Eastern European woman to elderly man: A dyke can kill three thousand woman! Most killer in de' world!
–Bedford Avenue & N 10th St, Williamsburg
Overheard by: Ken Thompson
Little boy exiting bathroom: You're not the only one alive here!
–Regal Cinemas, Union Square
Overheard by: MeiLi
Girl to friend: If I died, and you heard about it–please burn me.
–Astoria, 21st St
Professional woman to another: Well, because I know that you are opposed to genocide and everything…
–Union Square
Three-year-old black girl stabbing at her SpaghettiO's: Die cracker die!
–Day Care Center, Bedford-Stuyvesant, Brooklyn
Woman (coming out of store): Where the hell you been?
Man (waiting on sidewalk): Right here!
Woman: The whole time?
Man: Yeah.
Woman: I got pregnant.
Man: …what, just now?
–Fulton Mall, Brooklyn
Drunk guy outside window: Where am I? I know I'm in Brooklyn…
Drunk girl: Yeah, we're in Brooklyn.
Drunk guy: Yeah, but what borough is Brooklyn in?
–Atlantic Avenue
Overheard by: Jonah
Baby thug: Why do you yell at me so loud when you're angry?
Mama thug: I never yell at you when I'm angry.
Baby thug: But, mama, you always yell at me so loud when you're angry.
Mama thug: Yeah, I do. It's because I'm so angry.
–Sunset park, Brooklyn
Older thug to hot teen walking by: I started commitin' sins when you was still playin' with barbies.
Hot teen: (gives him the finger)
Older thug (singing): “They tried to make me go to rehab and I said no no no…”
–Broadway & Madison
Overheard by: Anne
