Big black guy on bike: Yeah…it'll be a smokey party.
Skinny black guy: Yo…this school shit is whack–I got an ounce to smoke through, but I've been so busy with school… I mean, yesterday I only smoked three blunts.
Big black guy on bike: Ooooh, son. Ouch.
–Broadway & Washington Place
Overheard by: Sydney m
Old man: I went to a party the other night–it was a girlfriend-swapping party!
Cook: Oh, yeah?
Old man: I hadda throw in cash!
–Greasy Spoon, Church St
Overheard by: missal
Girl #1: I like can’t even wait for going out tomorrow night, it will be so fun!
Girl #2: I know, but like, we are always the ones who plan our nights out.
Girl #1: Yeah, I know! But we are like so good at it, we should be PR girls! Or party planners!
Girl #2: Yeah! We could do child party planning, and like, we could take them to the zoo!
Girl #1: Oh my god, yeah! But we would have to bring alcohol for us.
Girl #2: Well, what would the kids do then?
Girl #1: I dunno, they could like go off and do their own thing while we drink, right?
Girl #2: Totally.
–The Bronx Zoo
Overheard by: kevin
Chick on cell, not visibly pregnant: I'm having a c-section and a cigarette.
–Simply Natural, 43rd & 10th
Overheard by: Pleased
Recurrent drunkard to bar: I'm not a smoker! I'm a libertarian, for fuck's sake!
–Peter McMannus Pub
LIRR conductor: There will be no pugilism on this train. Additionally, tonight marks the first night of Kwanzaa, and in the spirit of Kwanzaa, I ask you to not smoke on this train. This is the final warning: if you are smoking, you will be ejected at the next convenient stop. Also, no throwing up is allowed on the train. The two places where you may throw up are in the conveniently-located bathrooms, or on yourselves. Again, merry Kwanzaa.
–LIRR
Overheard by: Jenna K
NYU girl: Do you have a cigarette to ease my cough?
–Waverly & Mercer
Chick: Mad Men is like porn for smokers.
–172nd St & Broadway
Overheard by: Ladle
Chick: What are you doing this weekend?
Guy: I’m going to a passover rave.
Chick: What the hell is a passover rave?
Guy: That’s where we have a Seder, then drop ecstasy and go dancing.
Chick: That is so awesome. Can I come?
Guy: You’re not Jewish.
–Waiting Room, Pacific College of Acupuncture Clinic
Overheard by: Colleen
Skinny black man: Can you tell me what a fiasco is?
White guy at table with him: Yeah, it's like a party, a big party.
–Outside Nathan's, Coney Island
Overheard by: Justi
Guy on cell: Get the hell out of here! I just can’t believe that someone would go to a baptism just to start a fight.
–65th & 1st
Woman walking alone in a wedding dress and veil, on cell: Yeah, I got kicked out.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: yum
Conductor over loudspeaker: Our next stop will be New York Penn Station, please make sure you have all your personal belongings when leaving this train… And for all you football fans out there, Giants just fucking won! Everyone can put their feet on the seats, we’re celebratin’ tonight!
Passengers: Yeah!
–NJ Transit
Overheard by: Vicksburg
Girl: There’s a deli now.
Guy: They moved to Delhi?
Girl: No, there’s an Israeli deli there now, which tells you something about the scene.
Guy: I thought they moved to Delhi “where the trance scene is happening”.
–27th street office
HS girl #1: I’m just so tired of school boys.
HS girl #2: Yeah. Me too. I’m pretty much all about investment bankers now.
HS girl #1: Oh my god. I’m so going to invite you to my next investment banker party.
–78th & Lex
