Hipster girl: What's that?
Salvadorian guy: My benefits card, like food stamps. You could get one!
Hipster girl: Really?
Salvadorian guy: You should! We could barbecue non-stop! For free!
–Starbucks, Astor Place
Overheard by: anyabelisle
Hipster girl: What's that?
Salvadorian guy: My benefits card, like food stamps. You could get one!
Hipster girl: Really?
Salvadorian guy: You should! We could barbecue non-stop! For free!
–Starbucks, Astor Place
Overheard by: anyabelisle
Girl #1: This morning, when I peed, it smelled like Rice Krispie treats…
Girl #2: Ooh, yum! Let's make some!
–Whole Foods, Union Square
Man on phone: Well, I got a shirt but it wasn't quite what I was looking for, so I'm gonna go to Whole Foods and get some breadsticks.
–Astor Place
Older, bespectacled white male at table with wife: Motherfuckin' tube socks…
–Jazz Standard, 27th & Park
Overheard by: V
6'6" man (earnestly): Honestly, if I were Hillary, I would never wear a pantsuit! You know what I mean?
–Bellevue Hospital
Overheard by: Ingwall
Cracker: I hate fighting rastas. Man, I really do. It's those hats…you never know what they're hiding in those fuckin' hats!
–Marcy & Broadway
Man: Do you realize you just offended a man carrying an organic tote bag?
–6 Train
Overheard by: wb
Barfly to bartender: Is that your belt or a wrinkle in the fabric of time?
–Thirsty Scholar, 2nd Ave & 10th St
Overheard by: Jas
Hootchie, about subway smell: It smells like gooood chicken in here. Like McDonald's.
–86th St Subway Platform
Overheard by: EthanK
Barnard girl, indignantly: Chickens don't have thighs!
–Columbia University
Overheard by: The Thighless Wonder
Kid to friends: Oh, shit! I forgot there's a chicken in my backpack!
–Canal St Subway Station
Overheard by: Mel
Cracked out lady on one crutch to cashier: Do you guys still carry like, hamburgers and chicken sandwiches and stuff?
–McDonald's
Overheard by: Ben
Perspiring panhandler on definitely non-organic substances holding a can and singing: I love chickennn…chicken breastsss and thighhhs…chicken heads…mmmmmmm…I love them goooood (keeps going) Thank you. (extends his can for donations)
–7 Train
Overheard by: OG Bergenfield
Woman on phone with friend: I mean he wouldn't even cut my chicken in half for me at dinner. I was all givin' him shit for it. We got in this fight and I told him, "That's what people do to show each other that they care! They cut each other's chicken in half or make them a can of soup or whateva'!" You know what I'm sayin'?
–88th St & Broadway
Teen hipster on cell: You know, light pink is the navy blue of India. It's true! Don't ask me how I know this but I do.
–6th & 51st
Overheard by: simon
Flamboyant nasal-voiced man on cell: I'm feeling blue…like, royal blue…a little lighter…no, not baby blue…like, American flag blue…like…yeah.
–Jamaica LIRR Station
Aussie on cell: There were all these dudes wearing pink shirts…and they weren't even gay!
–55th & 8th Ave
Overheard by: wearing a pink shirt and gay
Girl to friend: So he made carrot salad and I said "Your poop is gonna be orange!"
–The Frying Pan, Chelsea
Latina: Well, she said "It wasn't white! It was yellow!" So I was like, "Well, was it at least shaped like a penis?"
–4th Ave & 40th, Brooklyn
Man collecting money: One penny, one penny! No one should be hungry!
Little child: You're wrong! Stop saying that!
–Waverly & University Place
Overheard by: Obviously a Republican
Fireman on loudspeaker, as he drives by Magnolia Bakery in fire truck: It's just a cupcake!
–11th & Bleecker
Overheard by: Chris
Disappointed 20-something girl to girlfriends: Yeah, but they don't have chocolate covered penises there.
–Bleecker St
Overheard by: Brookelyn
Large Italian guy: What happened to my tiramisu? That's what I want to know!
–LIRR to Penn Station
Girl covered in pink frosting on cell: There's frosting all over me!
–170th & Broadway
Overheard by: Poogins
Hipster guy on cell: Yeah, so the food was like chocolate and chorizo…mother fucking chocolate and chorizo… No, it was good… You should try it… Why not? Fuck veganism! Some website… Myjambi. M-y-j-a-m-b-i. Why chocolate? How should I know? It's for the website. Yes, the website! I don't know why the dog was there.
–28th & Park
Old woman to overweight woman: You look like you would know the answer to this… Where is a cupcake bakery around here?
–53rd & 3rd
Hipster #1: Every time I sleep with your mom she makes me half a sandwich.
Hipster #2: She makes me a low-fat sandwich.
Hipster #1: A half a sandwich is a low-fat sandwich.
–14th St & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: Quarter Sandwhich
Blonde chick: Where do you want to get brunch?
British boyfriend: I don't care, anywhere really…
Hobo in Saudi head wrap: Ahh, the youth of America, just shopping and fucking!
–Carmine & Bedford
Overheard by: Maggie
Little girl #1: Yeah, cookies and onions.
Little girl #2: Cookies!
Little girl #1: Onions.
Little girl #2: Cookies!
Little girl #1: Onions!
Little girl #2: Cookies!
Little girl #1 (pauses, thinks about it): Beer!
–54th & 7th
Overheard by: Chloefron
