Black guy: Why would a young black girl dye her hair blonde? Looks terrible, y’know.
Whitey: Um, yeah. Bad idea.
Black guy: Bitch looked like a burnt grilled cheese sandwich.
–One Penn Plaza
Black guy: Why would a young black girl dye her hair blonde? Looks terrible, y’know.
Whitey: Um, yeah. Bad idea.
Black guy: Bitch looked like a burnt grilled cheese sandwich.
–One Penn Plaza
Lady #1: This stuff is really good. It has antidotes in it. It’s good for your skin.
Lady #2: You mean ANTIOXIDANTS. An ANTIDOTE is a short story.
–Barnes & Noble
Young woman to another: I've done some soul searching. I'm now willing to believe it's not butter.
–Park Ave & E. 79th
Overheard by: andy
Annoying lady to worker who apparently mishandled her food: Apologize to the sandwich!
–Subway, Brighton Beach
Overheard by: Robert
Chick on cell: I try to eat as many acidic things as possible since I have a very creamy nature.
–35th & 7th
Girl on cell: Girrrrllll…he was meltin' me like butter last night.
–Bedford Ave & N 5th
Overheard by: Marleni
College guy: All molds are not created equal! Think about yogurt, man, it's all frickin mold!
–Columbia College Walk
Would-be CIA student on cell: Yeah, so I think my interview at the CIA went well. I think I'll really like it there. (notices people around him) …the Culinary institute of America! (everyone smiles)
–80th & Broadway
Overheard by: Roth Hall
Frat boy #1: She smelled like… You know that smell, when you eat asparagus, and then take a piss.
Frat boy #2: No, wait, I kinda like that smell.
–10th & 1st
Overheard by: Katie
Mother, after listening to child talking nonstop: You are so bizarre.
Six-year-old boy, seriously: I eat bugs.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Good to Know
Guy: They have Bob Marley’s last burrito — just like the other place we went to.
Girl: Didn’t he only have one last burrito?
–Burritoville, East Village
Dude on cell: Alright, listen up. If the guy gets up and walks away, he's not dead. If you come back and he's still lying there, he's dead, you follow? So, in that situation you are just going to go through the motions like we discussed.
–23th & 7th
Overheard by: mel
Random man on bicycle to doorman: You never know when you're going to eat a bad mushroom and die.
–87th St & York Ave
Overheard by: Critter
Jersey woman, looking at a case with brains that suffered from major stroke: Oh my gawd… They probably died from that!
–Bodies The Exhibition, South St Seaport
Guy shopping in art supply on a cell: So you're banking on dying young, then?
–Art Store, Williamsburg
Spacey old guy to friends, calmly: I want to murder that guy. (even more calmly) I've got bloodlust in my heart.
–9th St b/w 1st & 2nd
Overheard by: JKW
Woman on cell: You want to be cremated, right? (pause) Well, then what the hell are we going to do with you?
–Park Ave
Woman on cell: I think they put onions in my sandwich. I’m running home now, let me call you when I get off the toilet.
–Park Slope
Overheard by: Anne C.
Chick: Are you hungry? I have some leftover vietnamese food you can have.
Hobo: Well, what is it? I’m religious. I don’t eat pork.
Chick: There’s no pork. It’s just vegetarian noodles.
Hobo: Noodles? Nah, I’m trying to cut back on carbs.
–Grand Central food court
Homeless man with fake gold teeth: Can you lovely people please spare some change, a sandwich, or some water?
Woman: Oh my god… It’s Flavor Flav!
Homeless man: If that’s going to help me get a sandwich, then yeah, I am Flaaavor Flaaav.
–Downtown 2 train
Overheard by: Monica Lake
