Girl #1: Oh my God, we are all wearing the same shirts!
Girl #2: We are all in the volleyball team.
Girl #3: Shut up.
–L train
Overheard by: Karen
Girl #1: Oh my God, we are all wearing the same shirts!
Girl #2: We are all in the volleyball team.
Girl #3: Shut up.
–L train
Overheard by: Karen
Chick: I wish it would snow so I could make a Kate Moss joke.
–F train
Black dude following girl: Hey man, check out that ass! Look at that ass! That’s some fine ass. Look at that ass.
Black chick being followed: (into her phone) Hold on. (turns to man) Nigga, go away!
–Broadway & Lafayette
Overheard by: Ivan
Asian girl to friend: You know her! She’s the Asian girl — you know, the one with the eyes!
–Empire State Building
Overheard by: Chuckles
Little boy about Japanese man: Mom, how come that man is closing his eyes all the time?!
–Liberty St
Overheard by: galgal
Emo Asian boy: You can recover from drug or alcohol addictions, but there is no cure for Asianism.
–Weinstein Dining Hall, NYU
Drunk Asian man: Did you see that mosaic? It’s all wrong. The Asians were all one shade of yellow. What kind of art work is that? Look at me and my people — we’re multiple shades!
–R train
20-something woman: Being an Asian and being a tranny aren’t the same thing.
–Dallas BBQ, Chelsea
Overheard by: Ladle
Girl on cell: Yeah, so he was kicked out of college. It’s kind of a long story. He like, pulled a knife on George Lucas.
–Barnard College
Curly-haired chick: If we go, like, cowboy/Indian, you’re supposed to be giving me smallpox blankets and liquor, and I’m supposed to hold a knife to your scalp. Hmmm.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Wild Dog Boy
Girl (yelling at other girl): Just because he cuts himself doesn’t mean he’s emo!
–Brooklyn Tech HS
16-year-old to another: If Dane Cook was here, he would stab you in the chest.
–The Beacon School
Gay man to female friend: I’m gonna cut out your G-spot with a butter knife and stick it to the wall.
–Dojo Resaurant
Tall, muscular, handsome guy on cell: My night turned out pretty crazy… Why? Because this chick drew a knife on me in the restaurant before we even finished the appetizers… And I blame you for that.
–Grand Army Plaza
Overheard by: wishes she would have been there…
Girl #1: To tell the truth, I don't know why everyone's sad he's gone… He sounded like a horrible person. He wasn't exactly a faithful guy, from what I've heard.
Girl #2: Well, no, he only cheated on her once.
Girl #1: Once is one time too many! And he seems like the type to beat her, too.
Girl #2: No. Well, wait… He did… But it was only once.
Girl #2: Oh, okay! Only once…
–Starbucks
Overheard by: Itwasonlyonce
Cute girl to guy she went to high school with: We should totally hang out! I mean, I have no idea who you are, but…
–Downtown A Train
Overheard by: The Green Cat
Chick #1: We should go to class baked!
Chick #2: That would be a terrible idea.
Chick #1: Okay, we should go drunk, then.
Chick #2: That’s a good idea.
–Ladies’ room, NYU Law
Tall B&T girl: So then we made out and were all over each other and it was all PDA, and then we lost our virginities to each other. And I felt guilty because I was, like, 18, and he was, like, a minor.
Short B&T girl: Well how old was he?
Tall B&T girl: (silence)
Short B&T girl: Come on, most guys are like 15 when they lose their virginity.
Tall B&T girl: He was thirteen.
Short B&T girl: Oh.
–75th & Broadway
Overheard by: Harriet Vane
Girl #1: Hey look! (whispering) It says “poopy” right there.
Girl #2: (goes to the counter and looks at the sign) That doesn’t say “poopy”! It says “poppy”!
Girl #1: Really!? Oh my god! That’s so funny!
Girl #2: At first I thought you said they were “booby bagels”.
–Bay Ridge Ave & 4th Ave
Overheard by: Azzerrr
