(teen comes onto train and does the whole spiel about selling M&Ms for his school, walks up and down the car, no one buys anything)
Teen: I'm also selling weed.
Guy: Really?
Teen: No. But I should go back to dealing, this shit doesn't pay.
–A Train
Overheard by: Graham Davis
Guy: So let me get this straight. First, you sleep with my brother, then you get pregnant, then—
–LES
Partially Overheard by: Matty Sallin
Metrosexual guy: If I was some fish…
Girl, not looking up from her bus schedule: Grammar just cried.
Metrosexual guy: I don’t follow you.
Girl: Good, because if you did, I would have to have you arrested.
Metrosexual guy: I am so confused.
Girl: Do the words ‘you are an idiot’ confuse you?
Metrosexual guy: I hate you.
–28th & 5th
Guy: Did you hear that Sam broke up with Angie?
Girl: Good for him! [Guy stares at her in disbelief.] Uh… I mean… Oh, poor Angie!
–NYU dining hall
Asian guy #1: Hey, would you date a female version of yourself?
Asian guy #2: No way bro, I don’t date white bitches.
–Columbia University
Guy #1: What did you do with her after dinner?
Guy #2: We went back to my place for game of “just the tip.”
–4th St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: Aussieguy
Dude #1: I'm going to the Radio City Christmas show.
Dude #2: I'm reporting you to the guy association of America.
Dude #1: No, I really like it!
Dude #2: I am definitely reporting you!
–6th Ave & 35th St
Guy #1: Please sit down!
Girl: No, it’s okay.
Guy #1: No, I insist, please sit.
Girl: Really, I feel bad. I can’t take your seat.
Guy #1: Please sit.
Guy #2: Would you just shut the heck up and sit down already, God!
–R train
Overheard by: Margot Mainers
Black Santa takes off his beard, puts a cigarette in his mouth and starts to adjust his crotch.
Little girl in stroller: Daddy, why is Santa smoking?
Daddy: Well, obviously it’s a fake Santa…
Other passersby, scolding: Santa!
Black Santa: What? Santa’s gotta friggin’ fix himself sometimes, don’t he?
–Rockefeller Christmas tree
Overheard by: Megan Cowles
Young Man #1: No, no no no!
Young Man #2: You’re wrong and they’re wrong.
Young Man #1: Naw, man, look-
Young Man #2: You are WRONG and they are WRONG.
Young Man #1: They can’t, it’s not like-
Young Man #2: A psychiatrist is a DOCTOR, man.
Young Man #1: So is a massage therapist!
–39th & 12th
Overheard by: Keri
