Guy #1: Anyways, how’s Coco?
Guy #2: I don’t have Coco anymore man. I got a new dog.
Guy #1: Really? What happened to Coco?
Guy #2: Coco hung himself.
–Waverly & Mercer
Overheard by: Noah Lagin
Guy #1: Anyways, how’s Coco?
Guy #2: I don’t have Coco anymore man. I got a new dog.
Guy #1: Really? What happened to Coco?
Guy #2: Coco hung himself.
–Waverly & Mercer
Overheard by: Noah Lagin
Man: Of course, by this point I’ve experienced all sorts of international butt-cracks.
–34th & 8th
Overheard by: ghilledhu
Fat man: Of course this statue was French-made — when you look up her dress she’s not shaved.
–Statue of Liberty
Checkout lady: Nah, he’s third generation. He’s not a real Greek, he’s a fake Greek.
–Key Food, Astoria
Overheard by: sara n.
Guy: Do you think anyone will notice that I’m French?
–E 8th St & Broadway
British bloke, loudly on cell: Listen, I don’t give a shit what time it is over there, you fucking lazy, German sack of shite.
–World Trade Center
Overheard by: alright guv’nor
Lady, about her dog: I think a Mexican family owned him. He refuses to eat anything but rice and beans.
–Diner
Girl on cell: She has this Spanish boyfriend from work who has a girlfriend. But, I guess in Spain or wherever, that’s okay.
–Union Square
Overheard by: kelsey
Airport worker #1: Did you hear about that old black fireman in L? Called himself ‘The Big Dog,’ so the other white fire fighters snuck dog food into his food and then teased him with barking noises for weeks after…
Airport worker #2: No.
Airport worker #1: He sued for discrimination and got, like, a million dollars.
Airport worker #2: That reminds me, we’ve thought about sneaking you cat food.
–JFK
Overheard by: AJ
50-something Long Island woman, showing pictures of her dog while talking non-stop about it: And this is Cici wearing a hat, she usually wears a hat when she goes out. And this is Cici, very drunk…
–LIRR
Overheard by: Adam Nathan
Guy on cell walking a tiny poodle: Dude! The dog did it again. (pause) No, I swear, dude. The. Dog. Did. It. Again. (pause) Dude! This dog talks. Talks.
–Broadway & 43rd St, Astoria
(little girl finishes petting a stranger's dog)
Girl's mother: Now say "thank you" to its human.
–Central Park Lawn
Hyper tween schoolgirl: Hey mom, remember when we brought the dog to the mall and he peed in a coconut?
–La Pallette, 12th St
Guy to friend: I love her more than anything, but something about the way her puppy's paws smell really seal it.
–Rosa's Pizza, Penn Station
Overheard by: Craig
Chick: You have the responsibility of perming your own dog.
–Ellis Island Ferry
Dude: … So the guy says, ‘They always think they want their dog stuffed, but they really don’t,’ and that’s why he makes you pay in advance.
–Duff’s, Williamsburg
Overheard by: LP
JAP: I think when I get back I want to get a dog… And then maybe one of my parents could be my intern. — like, take care of the dog and stuff. I don’t understand why that is such a ridiculous suggestion. I mean, it’s not like they’re doing anything of interest.
–6 train, 42nd St
Overheard by: Adrienne
Little girl chasing pigeon: Bye-bye, doggie!
–DeSalvio Park playground, Spring & Mulberry
Overheard by: jharris
Cashier to customer: Have a good night and enjoy your… dog food.
–Animal Crackers, E 2nd St
Overheard by: Sara
Little girl to father: Daddy, can we eat the dog food?
–Whole Foods, Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Yum yum gimme some
Young woman: Thank you so much for picking me up with my dog! No one would stop for me.
Cabbie: People who love animals love humans. If you can’t clean up the shit of a dog, how are you going to clean up the shit of humanity?
Young woman: Wow, that’s deep. I totally agree.
–18th & 3rd
20-something women in yoga gear, simultaneously: It was like a blessing in cake form.
–Astor Place
Girl: I'm too single to eat a brownie.
–NYU Library
Guy on cell: Soft Serve is so good, you will step in dog poop and not even care!
–14th St b/w 7th & 8th
Serious guy on his way out of restaurant, to girl: So all we need are aspirin and Skittles.
–Angelo's Pizza
Assertive little boy in shopping cart seat, grabbing mom's face: I want to buy a chocolate croissant and eat it. Do you understand what I'm saying?
–Food Coop, Park Slope
Overheard by: Jenny
A guy is walking a dog with huge private parts.
Girl: Is that a boy dog or a girl dog?
Guy: I think it’s a girl.
Girl: That’s a pussy?
–23rd & 7th
Overheard by: Fatty McFingers
Teen boy: “Romanian”? What’s that, Italian?
–N train
Queer #1: So my dad put the dog's medicine in my eye. It worked, but I was completely scandalized!
Queer #2: Yeah.
–MoNH
