I Hear She Shops at a Tiny, Tiny Version Of Wet Seal

Little girl, sadly: But she got the new Barbie…
Mom: Yeah, but hers is super janky… Yours is the good one, it was all customized for you. You don't want hers.
Little girl: Oh.

–N Train

Overheard by: Brittany M

Posted on April 28, 2015
Compare/Contrast, Kids, Moms, On the Subway, Parents, Pop Culture, Wishes & desires

Too Soon for a Heath Ledger Headline?

Six-year-old boy: Mom, did you know that Elvis Presley died of a drug overdose?
Mom: Well, that won't ever happen to you.
Six-year-old boy, angrily: How do you know?

–Atlantic Ave Station

Overheard by: Jon Good

Posted on April 28, 2015
About Celebrities, Anger Management, Death, Hard Drugs, Kids, Moms, Parents, Subway stations, platforms, etc.

More Spitting and Hissing Than a Gay Bar

Little girl: Mommy! I want to open a cat park!
Mother: You mean a dog park?
Little girl: Mooooommmmmmmmm! No! A cat park!

–Ave A & St. Mark's Place

Posted on April 27, 2015
Alphabet City, Gay Man's Best Friend, Kids, Man's Best Friend, Moms, Parents, Wishes & desires

And I Hate When She Questions My Hoplology

Greek male #1: Your mother is upset! She is very mad about this!
Greek male #2: She is mad at me?
Greek male #1: Yes! Because you did not take care of the job.
Greek male #2: I did! I used the black knife with the big blade. The good one.
Greek male #1: Oh, very good.
Greek male #2: You are upset. I can see it in your eyes.
Greek male #1: No, I just had a couple of beers.

–Crescent & Ditmars, Astoria

Overheard by: Natalie

Posted on April 25, 2015
Anger Management, Astoria, Drinking & Drunk People, Foreigners, Jobs & Careers, Parents, Weapons

Wednesday O-o-o-oooo-One-Liners

Skinny Spanish girl: That nigga was saying how he had me moaning and screaming, but I was like, "nigga, I'm just loud–that doesn't mean you're good!"

–Ft. Hamilton Parkway, Brooklyn

Overheard by: also loud

Ghetto chick to friend: Yo…in my country, it's illegal to not please your woman. You gotta fuck her till she begs you to stop.

–116th & 1st

Overheard by: DonnaRae

Man on phone: Yeah…I just fingerblasted her for like an hour. No big deal.

–E 4th St & 2nd Ave

Overheard by: intern2

Mom to teenage son: And I was like "sure, have sex in my bed, it never sees any."

–Mercer & W 3rd

Girl on cell: Oh no, he's back fucking his secretary now, so I'm like, completely free!

–East Village

20-something on cell, after loud graphic sex tale: And don't you be telling anyone! I don't like strangers knowing my business.

–Express Bus to Brooklyn

Posted on April 25, 2015
All Wednesday One-Liners, Brooklyn, Bus, Comebacks, Crime and Punishment, Friends, Ghetto Chicks, Girls, Hand-Jobs, Harlem & Morningside Heights, Infidelity, Latinos, Men, Moms, On Cell, On the Bus, One-liners, Parents, Rumor Has It, Sex, Skinny People, Street, Stupidity, Teens, The Village, Union Square and East Village, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness

And a Pimp Really Has to Have Some Sort of STD, You Know

Teen boy #1: So why did your dad lose his job?
Teen boy #2: All I know is that he had hepatitis for six months and cured it by eating nothing but fruit.

–83rd & 16th, Brooklyn.

Overheard by: Porko Rico