Summer camp counselor to young summer camper: Why you so afraid? That's something you can see in the Bronx!
Summer camper: Aaahhh!
Summer camp counselor to young summer camper: It's just a pigeon!
–Central Park Zoo
Summer camp counselor to young summer camper: Why you so afraid? That's something you can see in the Bronx!
Summer camper: Aaahhh!
Summer camp counselor to young summer camper: It's just a pigeon!
–Central Park Zoo
Girl in bikini top and miniskirt: Do you think he'd fuck me?
Girl on skates: I think he'd fuck anybody.
Girl in bikini top and miniskirt: Awesome… I'll be right back.
–29th & 1st
Overheard by: listener222
20-something black guy: Daaamn girl, you got a number?
Teenage black girl, pushing stroller: I got a baby.
–Bed-Stuy
Whiny yuppie hipster #1: All the things we supposedly owe these people, just because they gave us life.
Whiny yuppie hipster #2, semi-ironically: Exactly. I mean, who asked to be born?
Whiny yuppie hipster #3, earnestly: Nobody! Nobody ever asks to be born!
–Greenmarket, Union Square
Overheard by: Suze V
Angry young man: She fucking broke up with me over a handjob!
Impassive friend: Well, how did that happen?
Angry young man: I was about to cum, and she was there, right there!, you know? Between my legs! So I told her I was going to, and she just fuckin' stared at me. I was like, “Baby, this is coming.” Seriously. It does happen. “Lift your shirt up or something,” I said to her. You know? And she just, fuckin', on her knees, shuffles backwards and to her left–a good three yards away- still whacking me off. So, I'm like, “Baby, what the fuck? You can't give a handjob from across the room.” You know, dude? That's like one of those fucking old people extending claw arm shits jerking you off from the corner when you're sitting in the center of your room! Fuck, dude!
Impassive friend, laughing: Yo, I'd blue-ball you, too, if you called me a fucking robot while I was getting you off!
–Forest Hills
Overheard by: FrankALank
Young woman #1, before movie starts: I'm gonna go.
Young woman #2: Why? Don't go.
Young woman #1: I'm gonna meet up with my man.
Young woman #2: Come on! Don't you want to stay for the movie?
Young woman #1: I'm gonna leave now cause: first of all… booty call. Second of all… dick. Third of all… dick. Fourth… my man is sick and I have Tums with me.
–Movie, Bryant Park
Girl #1: Intelligence is the most important thing, y'know? Is he intelligent?
Girl #2: Oh, yeah. He's like the most intelligent person I've met.
Girl #1: Wow. So what does he do?
Girl #2: He's a model for Hollister.
–West Village
Overheard by: M
Preppy drunk blond #1 in ladies room: Oh my god! How are you? It's been so long since I've seen you!
Preppy drunk blond #2: Oh my god, I'm great! When I noticed I was bleeding I decided to come in here and wash my face!
–Circle Line Cruise
Overheard by: nika
Hip girl: They're playing a lot of songs about anal sex.
Hip guy: Wait, what?
Hip girl: You know, “move to the back of the bus” is anal sex.
Hip guy: This song is about Rosa Parks.
Hip girl: Seriously?
Hip guy: It's called “Rosa Parks.”
Hip girl: Well, Rosa Parks must have liked it in the ass. That's probably why she had to sit.
–Greenpoint
NYU girl #1: Yeah, I actually went through with it.
NYU girl #2: Oh god, did it hurt?
NYU girl #1: It was really nice feeling actually. The stuff was warm, but when it started taking effect it was like ear diarrhea.
–NYU
Overheard by: interesting
