Not ghetto black girl: How do you bag a girl?
Ghetto black boy: Come sit on my lap!
–Pete's Pizza, Ave M
Not ghetto black girl: How do you bag a girl?
Ghetto black boy: Come sit on my lap!
–Pete's Pizza, Ave M
Extremely drunk guy: Hey, how ya doin'?
Sober woman: Fine, thanks. (pause) Hey, this is my stop…gotta go! (dashes off train)
Extremely drunk guy to extremely drunk friend, after a long pause: Hey, I coulda had her if I wanted. I coulda been like, “if this is your stop, then it's my stop too, baby, why dontcha come home with me?” But I don' want any company tonight. I wanna be all by myself…in my own place…in my own bed…all alone.
–Uptown 1 Train
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Brunette: Have you ever had to be saved before?
Blonde: Nope, but when I was a lifeguard I had to save someone.
Brunette: Oh my god, did you have to give them RSVP?
–5 Train
Overheard by: Ami
Cashier: Wow, you speak really good English. Where are you from?
Hipster Asian dude: I'm from Tokyo and I've been taking classes since I was three so I'm really articulate and speak great English.
Cashier: Really?
Hipster Asian dude: Fuck no. I'm from Queens.
–Deer Park
Overheard by: Schmooty
Old British gentleman: The next train is when?
MTA employee in booth: 11:45.
Old British gentleman: This entire nation is incompetent!
–Grand Central Terminal
Girl: Am I turning into a unicorn?
Guy: No, you just have cancer.
–Boss Tweed's bar
Overheard by: Unicorns
Little boy near cafe: What's that smell?
Passerby: It's the smell of knowledge!
–Barnes & Noble
Male Fordham student: I think I witnessed a girl getting bad news about either being pregnant or getting STDs!
Female Fordham student: How do you know?!
Male Fordham student: Because she was on the phone and I heard her say “wait, that's not possible, how could the results come back as that?”
–Fordham University, Lincoln Center
Teenage Asian girl: I have a question: would you want me to hang out with a vampire?
Old Hispanic woman: No!
Teenage Asian girl: Okay. I knew that.
–2 Train
Overheard by: Ryan
Girl #1: I saw the most crack-whorish looking girl today in Starbucks.
Girl #2: Now, was she crack-whorish or heroine chic? Because there is a difference.
Girl #1: No. She was definitely a crack whore. I mean. Imagine Courtney Love…now imagine Courtney Love run over by a train.
–W 4th
Overheard by: xanaxfashoin
