Little boy: Mom, can I download you?
–Barnes & Noble, Astor Place
Little boy: Mom, can I download you?
–Barnes & Noble, Astor Place
Girl #1: I hooked up with Aaron on Friday. It was weird.
Girl #2: Hot Aaron or stupid Aaron?
Girl #1: Stupid Aaron.
Girl #2: Oh, my god, he is so hot.
–MAC Cosmetics, Spring Street
Excited girlfriend: Hey, are these soap bars?
Disinterested boyfriend: I don't know, why don't you drop one and find out?
–Bath & Body Works
Headline by: Harriet
Runners-Up:
· “And Nine Months Later…” – Junior
· “Dating Ex-Cons Has Its Drawbacks” – Mike
· “Part Of Bloomberg’s “Clean Up the Village!” Program?” – Bobo D Clown
· “Prison Etiquette 101” – Kosi
Preppy teen girl #1: The Twilight Zone is the best show ever!
Preppy teen girl #2: I'm gender confused.
–Toys R Us, Times Square
Little girl at Turkish booth, holding up one a glass evil eye: Daaaddyyy! I need this!
Dad: Honey, you don’t even know what that is.
Little girl: But the man said it would work if you believe, and I believe, Daddy, I really, really do!
–Columbus Circle Holiday Bazaar
Overheard by: Katie
Mom: I'm not made of money, you know!
Kid: You look like you are.
Mom: Well, I'm not.
–Strand Bookstore
Overheard by: she didn't look like she was…
Young woman on cell: So I said to him, are you going to listen to Barbra Streisand forever?
–Christopher & Bleecker
Overheard by: Korky
20-something girl: I'm a teenager! I collect pogs and say "suck it," and listen to Kriss Kross!
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Claire H.
Guy: Man, these guys are like The Beatles of my generation.
–In Line for Cypress Hill Show, Nokia Theatre
Burly MTA contractor: I mean imagine if it was a dude singing "I kissed a guy and I liked it."
–Chambers St Subway Station
Overheard by: sarah
Trendy girl: I can't believe they charge $1.29 for a song now. What song is worth $1.29?!? Well, I guess "Don't Stop Believing" and "We Are the Champions"… basically any Queen song.
–Coldstone Creamery, Astor Place
Overheard by: Any Britney Song
20-something girl to 20-something boyfriend: Don't dress up like Elton John because I want you to. Dress up like Elton John because you want to.
–Halloween Shop, 11th St & Broadway
Little boy: Mommy, I want this!
Mom: Do you want Santa to bring it for you?
Little boy: No, I want you to get it now.
–FAO Schwarz, 5th Avenue
Overheard by: CMC
Teenager: Dude, my sister is always stealing her friends’ books, but like, sometimes no one has the book she wants, how much easier would it be if there was like, a Blockbuster, but for books.
–Blockbuster
Girlfriend to boyfriend: Did you bring something to read on the train? I’m trying to decide if I want to talk to you, sleep, or read my book.
–A Train
Overheard by: The Green Cat
Teenage girl: I need Romeo and Juliet. But do you have any with, like, the English on one side and Shakespeare on the other?
–Barnes & Noble, Union Square
Spoiled colleg girl to friend: My mom really wants me to get a nice big tote because she’s really worried about how I’m going to carry all my books. But I’m, like, worried if I’m even going to read my books.
–Outside Bloomingdale’s Dressing Room
Chick: So they called him up on stage, and they were like: "We want to bestow this honor upon you." And he was like: "It is indeed an honor, an honor indeed." And I’m all like: "Come on, like, I mean, seriously, like, who talks like that? Can’t you take it down a notch! Don’t you read US Weekly or anything?
–Starbucks, Woolworth Building
NYU girl to male friend: There’s almost something poetic about it, you know? Like, the 20-year-old Catholic virgin from Connecticut losing it to the older Ecuadorian lothario? Hell, I should just write a book about my life.
–NYU Dining Hall
Guy on cell: I'm walking down St. Marks, and I'm having psychological issues. That's why I'm calling this NYU support number.
–Astor Place
Overheard by: A preponderance of hipsters can sort of do that to you…
Stylish guy on phone: No, I do not have time to check if anyone is gesticulating at me, I'm walking to Chipotle!
–Sock Man, St. Mark's Place
Overheard by: Rachel Isadora
Thick-accented gentleman: You nevah saw that movie? Penguins walkin'?
–Smith & Wollensky's Steakhouse
Overheard by: kritta
Too-tan Columbia student: Oh my god! You should totally have picked up your phone the other night because I was totally ready to, like, walk by myself down 122nd Street to the d train, alone, at like, midnight! Even though I know it wouldn't have been very safe to do that, I was ready!
–Uptown 2 Train
Woman to another, holding the strings to 100 helium balloons: You never walk my balloons!
–Lafayette & Cumberland, Fort Greene
Overheard by: Brenda