Washington Square Park

NYU girl: There's not enough time. You can't get lunch.
NYU boy (running towards a hot dog cart): I can. I'm hungry!
NYU girl (shouting after him): You're fat!

–Washington Square Park

(hipster walks in wearing bright turquoise unicorn hat)
Professor: Are you pledging something?
Hipster: No, I am a unicorn.

–NYU Silver Building

Overheard by: sarah

Shirtless hobo #1: I lived in California before New York… the weather sucks most of the time there.
Shirtless hobo #2: Yeah, dude, I've heard that.

–Washington Square Park

Girl #1: One time I farted and there was a cute boy there and I was mortified.
Girl #2: Yes! What did you say?
Girl #1: I blamed it on a homeless person!
Girl #2: Holy crap that’s genius.

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: Shanon Kelley

Woman: Someone told me that there was a dead squirrel around here.
Sanitation woman: Don’t worry, we threw it away.
Woman: Oh. Do you know where? I’d like to have it.

–Washington Square Park South

Overheard by: Biebs

Bland middle-aged woman: It's not like you're giving head in the Port Authority bathroom!

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: j

English tourist: You'll go home and people will ask: "So what did you do on holiday?" You'll reply: "Oh, I gave the Empire State Building a blowjob!"

–34th St

Guy on cell: Ugh, fuck me in the ass. No… no, not you. Meanie. Why don't you just suck my dick. Suck my dick!

–34th Street

Dude on cell: It was like getting a blowjob from the inside.

–8th Ave & 53rd St

Guy on cell: Is that the guy that's been sucking your dick?

–81st & Amsterdam

Overheard by: Kelley

Young guy on cell: And then I said: "I could really use a blowjob right now." She was offended!

–48th & Park

Young black man to friend: Just because she sucks my dick doesn't make her Oprah Winfrey.

–B48 Bus

Old man to young woman with iPod and earbuds in hand: You could probably hear the music better if you put those in your ears.
Young woman: Shove it up your ass.

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: KatieL

Hobo #1: Hey, man! I thought you were dead!
Hobo #2: Dead where?

–Washington Square Park

NYU dude #1: What sources did you use for the final?
NYU dude #2: Urbandictionary.com.
NYU dude #1: Awesome.

–Washington Square South

Overheard by: Lezbotron

Queer to friend: What sign are you?
Friend: Leo.
Queer: Oh, good. I decided that I am going to base what I think of people based on their astrological signs, and I hate Geminis. Like, if I adopt a baby and it's a Gemini I'm going to give it back!

–Washington Square Park

Overheard by: poor kid