Well-dressed 60-something crazy white man looking into artsy coffee shop: What movie is this?
30-something white artsy man, smoking: This? This is a coffee shop.
Well-dressed 60-something crazy white man: Yes, yes… But what movie?
–Cafe, Luldow St
Well-dressed 60-something crazy white man looking into artsy coffee shop: What movie is this?
30-something white artsy man, smoking: This? This is a coffee shop.
Well-dressed 60-something crazy white man: Yes, yes… But what movie?
–Cafe, Luldow St
Smelly white teenager #1: Yo, man! I haven't been to school in over a week and a half. I've been just chillin' with my girlfriend.
Smelly white teenager #2: Oh, wow! Really?
Smelly white teenager #1: Yeah, I dunno what I'm gonna tell my parents–you know, when I first heard of the Passion of the Christ I thought it was a porno.
–Q58 Bus
Overheard by: Queens Girl
White guy in suit to drunk Asian girl coming out of the subway: Will you come home with me?
Please?
Asian girl: What? Why?
White guy: I'm lonely and I want to sleep together.
Asian girl: I'm not a prostitute, you dick!
–Time Square
Waspy girl #1: My mom and I are in a huge fight right now.
Waspy girl #2: Really? That sucks.
Waspy girl #1: Yeah, especially because to punish me she's taking me shopping.
Waspy girl #2: What?
Waspy girl #1: We go to all these stores and she makes me try on all these clothes while she makes comments about how fat I'm getting. And then she doesn't buy me anything because according to her I'm a whale.
Waspy girl #2: Wow.
Waspy girl #1: Yeah, I know. And people wonder why Wasps tend to be such alcoholics.
–Metro-North Train
Bag lady to white guy whistling “When the Saints Go Marching In”: Damn, nigger, that's my jam!
Guy: I'm… Ummm… sorry?
Bag lady: Yeah? Fuck you too!
(guy and girl walk away)
Bag lady: Shit, I gotta get outta this town and get my own place!
–L Train
Overheard by: The Music Man
Disheveled white female to two male black space-art painters: You gotta know Nate!
(no response from men) I took out his eyes and his dick.
–E 8th b/w Broadway & Astor
Overheard by: No clue what that actually meant
Crazy older guy to lady in park with barking dog: Lady, you keep that dog quiet! That dog is better-looking than you are.
–W 63rd & West End
Overheard by: Beez and Newb
Guy in red shirt: You make me feel so pedophilic when I tell you about violating my dog.
–Central Park
Man on cell: You're always saying your dog is sick! "My dog has diarrhea! I can't come out!"
–Fulton & Broadway
Overheard by: would you rather she have it?
Black kid to white couple walking poodle: I've only seen dogs like that in movies.
–Harlem
Overheard by: Poodle Lady
Girl on cell: So I'm getting off the a and I see this tall girl and I know her! So I'm like "Sarah?" and she's like "I haven't seen you since middle school!" and she cut all her hair off and she's like "When did you dye your hair black?" and my hair's soooo not black! But I saw Sarah! You know, the one whose cat tried to eat my toes off that one time! So we talked and then there was this lady who was totally tossing chow all over the place! Hello! Trash can right there—hold up, I gotta go, I see a Weiner dog!
–72nd St & Central Park West
Little boy: When we leave, how do we know how to get home?
Waspy mommy: Oh! C'mon sweetie, you know our street don't you?
Little boy: Uptown!
–Saks
Overheard by: smith
Black lady, as white lady opens trunk of parked BMW: Dammmmn, girl, that's a hot BM!
White woman: Thanks.
–East Harlem
Overheard by: iseecdctrucks.com
Cop to 7-Eleven employee: Man, I saw the hottest hooker last night!
–23rd St
White guy: People in Boston really like whoremongering, I guess.
–Park Slope
Overheard by: Ladle
Man on cell: But I'm the best escort in the country!
–Chelsea
Man on cell: I used to pay for hookers.
–10th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: nomo
Man on phone: The Caribbean thing… No, not the prostitute.
–Fulton St
Thugette to boyfriend: You don't have to go to Vegas to get a hooker, honey, you can just go to Atlantic City.
–Staten Island Ferry
