Tween girl #1: What? Seriously? You are so dumb. D-O-M!
Tween girl #2: It’s D-O-M-B! Are you kidding?!
–57th & 5th
Tween girl #1: What? Seriously? You are so dumb. D-O-M!
Tween girl #2: It’s D-O-M-B! Are you kidding?!
–57th & 5th
Guy #1: They put lead in ice cream so it makes you retarded.
Guy #2: Yeah?
Guy #1: Yeah, they put all sorts of chemicals in food; genocide, pesticide…
–A train
Man to woman: You wouldn't procreate with Boomer Esiason, even though he's the king of Cincinnati?
–Deli, Canal & Hudson
Overheard by: Uncle Bling
Man on cell: Elvis made ten million dollars last year and he's dead. There's no reason I can't make a thousand.
–Park Slope
Hipster: I like Steve Buscemi a lot more than I like you.
–Life Cafe, Bushwick
Overheard by: D
Woman in Southern accent to man: Look, the McGraw-Hill building. Tim McGraw and Faith Hill must own that building!
–W 49th St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Michael
Middle aged white man to friend: I finally figured it out. "Mystikal" sounds like a constipated Samuel L. Jackson.
–LIRR
Woman #1: I don’t care what kinda shit he was talkin’ about. That motherfucker was out of his mind!
Woman #2, motioning to small children nearby: Stop cursing.
Woman #1: Oh shit, I’m sorry.
–34th St N/R platform
Overheard by: jazzystar69
Tourist: What’s that entrance right over there… Where it says, ‘Exit’?
–Museum of Natural History
Overheard by: Ms. Dubs
Man to wife and children: I don’t know why you’re following me! I have no clue where I’m going!
–Rockefeller Center
Drunk male tourist: What time does Times Square close?
–Outside Yankee Stadium
Overheard by: Genissimo
Southern tourist dad: ‘Papa Yaking’? What in the hell kinda crazy Jewish name is that?
–14th & 7th
Overheard by: Manhattman
Fat Southern lady with teal leggings standing beside fat man with large rodeo belt buckle and USS Nimitz hat to security guard: We’re tourists…
–MoMA
Overheard by: Daniel B
Ten-year-old wannabe thug: I'ma put this can of pepper spray up your ass! You want me to put this up your ass?!
–Old Navy, Harlem
Worried bearded 50-something: Yeah, but how are we going to film an anal birth!?
–F Train
Street vendor selling his wares: I will shove your foot up the devil's ass!
–St Mark's Place
Yankee stadium employee yelling to another: Hey, wouldja bend over for a minute? I'll be right back!
–Yankee Stadium
Overheard by: torrie
Gay teen: His hole was as big as a traffic cone!
–1st & 14th
Sinfully ugly girl: I have to stop putting things in my ass.
–forever 21 (queens center mall)
Overheard by: defragment my harddrive
White guy: You mean, you don’t find Mexicans sexy? Sexy Mexicans?
White girl: Shhh! They can hear you!
White guy: Sssexicans?
–N train
Overheard by: curry sprinkles
Girl #1: He called me his girlfriend today.
Girl #2: Really?!
Girl #1: Yeah.
Girl #2: Oh my god, that’s nuts. What did he say?
Girl #1: Well, he described me as his ’20-year-old, beautiful girlfriend.’
Girl #2: Oh my god.
Girl #1: Yeah. I mean, it’s awesome, but I don’t know what that means. He probably just, like, said it because ‘girlfriend’ is a much nicer word than, like, ‘whore.’
–Lafayette & Astor Pl
Teen girl #1: Yo, you ever learned about the Holocaust?
Teen girl #2: Nah, I ain't never studied no holocost. I ain't never learned about no wars.
Teen girl #1: Except the Civil War.
Teen girl #2: Damn, high school was shit.
–Target, Atlantic Center
Ditzy chick: I'm not telling him that I love him because I don't want to set myself up for disappointment.
Flamboyant boy: Sometimes you have to take risks, or else you will never get “appointed”. (laughs)
Ditzy chick: Ha ha ha. “Appointed” isn't even a word.
–57th & Park Ave
Overheard by: Titiful
