It's Gonna Be Another Long Season

Co-ed: Excuse me, would you mind moving over so my friend and I can sit together?
Guy in Yankees cap: I ain't moving. You can find somewhere else to sit.
Bystander: Whoa, dude, the girl just wants to sit with her friend. Why are you being rude to her?
Guy in Yankees cap: It's my seat. I don't want to move. It's my right.
Bystander: I thought you were a Yankees fan.
Guy in Yankees cap: End of discussion.
Bystander: I thought you were a Yankees fan. You're a Yankees fan and you treat ladies like that?
Guy in Yankees cap: I ain't moving. End of discussion.

–1 Train

Overheard by: Rose Fox

Posted on June 7, 2010
Assholes, Friends, Offers and requests, On the Subway, Only in New York, Passengers, Public Transportation, Questions, Strangers, Yankees

Wednesday One-Liners Got Game

Old queer on cell: Okay, well I'll be watching the Mets game, or the Jets game, whatever you call it… What do they call it when you men all sit together and can't talk?

–Broadway & 103rd St

Iranian tourist to street performer: We don't have a vote but we have a basketball team!

–Washington Square

Overheard by: RAR!

Subway conductor: This is the uptown "d" express train, making all express stops in Manhattan and The Bronx, including 161st Street, so the Yankees can host the Minnesota Twins. We'd like to welcome all Detroit Tigers fans riding with us–shame you couldn't bring your team.

–Uptown D Train

Female sports fan: A-Rod's back baby! Kate Hudson has a magic pussy!

–Pub, 45th & 3rd

Overheard by: Pub crawler

Teenage girl to group of attentive friends: If leprechauns could play basketball, they would.

–High School, Queens

Overheard by: Sunny

Posted on January 27, 2010
About Celebrities, All Wednesday One-Liners, Animals & Nature, Bars & Clubs, Compare/Contrast, Conductors, Fast Times at New York High, Foreigners, Friends, Gays and Lesbians, Gender issues, Magic, Mets, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Names, Old People, On Cell, On the Subway, One-liners, Parks, Passengers, Politics, Public Transportation, Queens, Queer guys, Questions, Sports, Street, Teens, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center, Vagina, Vendors & Street Performers, Washington Square Park, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Women, Words, Yankees

TV Is TV, Curtis

Young woman: I want to see it when they give the Yankees the keys to the city.
Thug boyfriend: Okay.
Young woman: What do the keys open?
Thug boyfriend: It's just, like, a statue and shit.
Young woman: Oh, I thought they all got a turn trying to open the vault at the bank, and one of the keys works.
Thug boyfriend: You dumb bitch. That's The Price Is Right, not The World Series!

–E Train

Posted on December 6, 2009
Boyfriends, Insults, On the Subway, Thugs, TV, Wishes & desires, Women, Yankees

You Know That Was the Anniversary Of Our Third Open-Mouthed Kiss.

Guy, as scoreboard shows highlight of Derek Jeter diving into the crowd: Do you remember what day that was?
Girl: What day was that?
Guy: Why are you being a bitch?

–Yankee Stadium

Overheard by: Anthony

Posted on November 24, 2009
Girls, Guys, Insults, Nostalgia, Time, Yankee Stadium, Yankees

The Jersey Don't Lie

Yankee fan #1, in crowded station exit: I think this is the way to Yankee Stadium.
Yankee fan #2, pointing to guy in Jeter jersey: Yeah, there's Derek Jeter up there.

–B/D Station, 161st St

Overheard by: Xiao Hoah Dze

Posted on October 30, 2009
About Celebrities, Clothing, Directions, Friends, Subway stations, platforms, etc., The Bronx, Yankees

Wednesday One-Liner Pong

Frat dude: Mickey Mantle is the one dead person I would totally bring back to life to have gay sex with.

–Yankee Stadium Museum

Overheard by: sternie

30-something fratboy to wife: He still gives me mixtapes like we're still in high school!

–65th & Broadway

Overheard by: ENGLEBERT

Young frat boy to friend, deadpan: I came on her face. Then her mom walked in.

–59th St & Lexington

Overheard by: Josie

Drunk frat boy trying to pick up a girl wearing a red and white striped shirt: I'm sorry for interrupting, but I just wanted to tell you…I found Waldo.

–88th & 1st

Fratboy on phone: When was the baby born? (pause) Sick, dude!

–Penn Station

Posted on September 23, 2009
All Wednesday One-Liners, Babies, Books & Writing, Couples, Cum, Death, Drunks, Frat Boys, Friends, Gays and Lesbians, Girls, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, More museums, Music, On Cell, One-liners, Parents, Penn Station, Pick-up Lines, Pregnancy & Birth Control, Questions, School and studying, Sex, Street, Stupidity, Upper East Side, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Yankee Stadium, Yankees

Tomorrow's Lesson: The Boston Red Sox

Toddler, pointing to the Bronx on subway map: What?
Father: Yeah! That's the Bronx, baby girl! Yankee stadium. Better than the Mets and you best not forget! The Mets suck! The Yankees stink, but the Mets suck.

–L Train

Posted on May 22, 2009
Compare/Contrast, Dads, Insults, Kids, Mets, NYC Geography, On the Subway, Parents, Questions, Yankees

Letterman: “Hey, I'm Having a Better Season Than You.”

David Letterman recruiter: Late show with David Letterman! Free tickets to David Letterman!
New York Yankees pitcher Joba Chamberlain: Letterman sucks!

–Time Square

Posted on March 8, 2009
A-List, About Celebrities, Athletes, Flyer people, Insults, Times Square, Yankees

New Yorker Rule #293: Never Try to Reason with a Disgruntled Yankee Fan

Disgruntled Yankee fan #1: Tigers suck!
Disgruntled Yankee fan #2: They just beat us, asshole.

–Outside Yankee Stadium, after 6-2 Loss to Detroit

Overheard by: Jake Elwell

Posted on December 1, 2008
Guys, Insults, Yankee Stadium, Yankees

Juan Valdez! I Love Him!

Girl #1: Oh my god, I can't believe we saw him! And he just re-signed with the Yankees!
Girl #2: Oh my god, I love José Canseco!
Girl #1: You mean Jorge Posada, right?
Girl #2: Yeah, sure, whoever you said!

–50th & 6th Ave

Overheard by: Jason

Posted on October 31, 2008
Girls, Idiots, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Names, Stupidity, Yankees