Crying hot chick: I don’t understand why you spent half the night telling me all the reasons you can’t be with me and then wanted to have sex with me anyway!
Douchebag: Uh, you were pretty… And naked.
–Houston & Allen
Crying hot chick: I don’t understand why you spent half the night telling me all the reasons you can’t be with me and then wanted to have sex with me anyway!
Douchebag: Uh, you were pretty… And naked.
–Houston & Allen
Little girl (sad and upset): You guys always go to my favorite restaurants when I’m not there… like Pizzeria Uno.
Mom (annoyed): Just because you’re not there doesn’t mean we can’t do it.
–Mercer & 3rd
Overheard by: Sizzle
Girl in Snapple cap earrings: …my hamster did that. She used to jump off tables and stairs. She learned after a while to stop at the edge.
–D train
Asian chick: She has, like, an Asian face on a Brazilian body.
Friend: Ew!
Asian chick: Yeah, I know. Weird. But she's only nine, so…
–Broadway & W 38th
Overheard by: English bloke
Girl on phone: You know her, red hair, goes to a lot of shows… Her lip is kind of, y'know, stuck to her nose a bit on the one side.
–Union Square
Promoter to older man passing by: Excuse me, sir, you dropped your clitoris.
–St.Mark's Place
Suit: And his head was askew…
–79th St & Central Park West
Overheard by: Ladle
Suit on cell: The woman's toenails were three inches long.
–The Village
Guy to another: I knew a guy with a tail–an extended tailbone. It was thiiiis (shows) long!
–8th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: Rick
50-something New Yorker: He was Barbara Streisand's cousin! And he stretched my urethra. It was great! Well, not at the time. But now it's great!
–Broadway & 59th St
Overheard by: Nikki
Chick on cell: So I saw Damien last night…Yeah, he tried to sleep with me…No, I told him, “Damien, I’m not going to fuck you in the apartment where you live with your girlfriend slash fiance slash whatever!
–18th between 6th & 7th
Overheard by: Nick Braccia
Young guy: Well, I called her a ho, but I didn't mean it.
Young girl: But she was your date!
–14th St & 7th Ave
Chick #1: And I was like “Whaaaat?” Yo! Uh-huh.
Chick #2: I'm sayin'!
Chick #1: That shit was like…
Chick #2: Mmm-hmmm.
Chick #1: You know what I'm talking about.
–8th St b/w 5th & University
Overheard by: manhattman
Girl #1: You being serious?
Girl #2: Hell yeah!
Girl #1: I think you're crazy!
–Central Park
