Drag queen: With an accent like that, I know you drink.
German: No, really, I dun't!
Drag queen: But then how can I take advantage of you if you're sober?
–Lucky Cheng's
Drag queen: With an accent like that, I know you drink.
German: No, really, I dun't!
Drag queen: But then how can I take advantage of you if you're sober?
–Lucky Cheng's
Grey-haired white guy #1: That presentation had way too many numbers.
Grey-haired white guy #2: He loves numbers.
Grey-haired white woman: Numbers are good, but that was too many numbers.
Grey-haired white guy #1: I don't like numbers. Yo no quiero muchos numeros.
Grey-haired white guy #2: Si! Yo entiendo.
(they crack up)
Grey-haired white woman: Wait… What does that mean?
Grey-haired white guy #1: It means “I don't like numbers.” (they laugh again)
Grey-haired white guy #1: I heard Hispanic-speaking people don't actually say “me gusta.” Anyone know if that's true?
Grey-haired white guy #2: Hmm, I thought it was just Colombians.
Grey-haired white woman: I used to know a Puerto Rican woman.
–Financial District
Overheard by: Office Temp
Cop with hat tucked under arm to K-9 dog: Arooo-ooo-ooo!
K-9 dog: Ooouu-ooo-ooo!
Cop: Ouw-ouw-ouw!
K-9 dog: Arooo-ouw-ouw!
Cop and K-9 dog, in harmony: Ouw-ouw-ooooo!
Old man, putting $1 in cop's hat: Excellent.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Thomas
An Asian woman is talking loudly on her cell phone
Fat Black lady: You need to move to the back of the damn bus. We don’t wanna hear that ching-chang ching-chong bullshit!
–Q34 bus
Overheard by: Lauren
Student: Um, would we really use the extremely polite form with random strangers on the street?
Japanese teacher, exuberantly: Oh yes, definitely.
Class: [Laughter.]Japanese teacher: I’m not kidding, you don’t want to make them think you like them or want to get close to them… they’re a stranger! You want to keep as much emotional distance from them as possible.
–Japanese Class, Columbia University
Overheard by: Vicksburg
Student #1: How long have you been here?
Student #2: I live here for four years.
Student #1: Your English is perfect! What is your native language?
Student #2: I speak Thai. Your English is fine, too. You are from Trinadad, right? What is your native language?
Student #1: English.
–FIT library
Fat chick to cute friend's blind date: So, wait, is Jean Garafolo a man or a woman?
–Tribeca
Overheard by: Becka Dash
20-something blonde girl: Is there an English word for "quesadilla"?
–F Train
Checkout lady, pausing with a container of hummus after scanning it: Lots of people buy this stuff…what is it?
–Myrtle St
Overheard by: Myrtle & Carlton
Woman entering RadioShack: Excuse me, do you have radios?
–RadioShack, 72nd & Broadway
B9 bus driver to passengers: Make a left here?
–B9 Bus
Overheard by: VeganBeauty
Guy: This place has some really cool stuff.
Girl: (silence)
Guy: But I feel like it mainly has stuff for girls.
Girl: (silence)
Guy: Yeah, so do you know any good bars around here?
Girl: (silence)
Guy: Do you not speak English?
Girl: Oh! You were talking to me?
–Bedford Ave
Teenager: Dude, my sister is always stealing her friends’ books, but like, sometimes no one has the book she wants, how much easier would it be if there was like, a Blockbuster, but for books.
–Blockbuster
Girlfriend to boyfriend: Did you bring something to read on the train? I’m trying to decide if I want to talk to you, sleep, or read my book.
–A Train
Overheard by: The Green Cat
Teenage girl: I need Romeo and Juliet. But do you have any with, like, the English on one side and Shakespeare on the other?
–Barnes & Noble, Union Square
Spoiled colleg girl to friend: My mom really wants me to get a nice big tote because she’s really worried about how I’m going to carry all my books. But I’m, like, worried if I’m even going to read my books.
–Outside Bloomingdale’s Dressing Room
Chick: So they called him up on stage, and they were like: "We want to bestow this honor upon you." And he was like: "It is indeed an honor, an honor indeed." And I’m all like: "Come on, like, I mean, seriously, like, who talks like that? Can’t you take it down a notch! Don’t you read US Weekly or anything?
–Starbucks, Woolworth Building
NYU girl to male friend: There’s almost something poetic about it, you know? Like, the 20-year-old Catholic virgin from Connecticut losing it to the older Ecuadorian lothario? Hell, I should just write a book about my life.
–NYU Dining Hall
Young African American child pulling mother's hand: Ándale! Ándale!
African American mother: Cut that out! You're not Mexican!
–103 & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Alex