Middle aged woman from out of town: I don't think there are any theaters around here.
Middle aged man with large open map: Maybe. Are we still in New York?
–Broadway Junction
Overheard by: Nikki
Middle aged woman from out of town: I don't think there are any theaters around here.
Middle aged man with large open map: Maybe. Are we still in New York?
–Broadway Junction
Overheard by: Nikki
Subway voice: The next stop is Bleecker Street.
English tourist #1: Bleecker Street? What's next? Unhappiness Street? Miserable Street? Depression Street?
English tourist #2: Suicide Lane. That's what's next. Now there's a one-way street…
–Uptown 6 Train
Overheard by: Percival Under Cover
Teenage Guido on cell: The beer is staying in Marine Park. (pause) Yeah, we're going to Rockaway, but the beer is staying in Marine Park. In the alley. My alley! (pause) Yes! You don't understand English, dude!
–Burger King
Overheard by: Laura E.
Guy on cell: I'm always skeptical of people these days who say they want to go out in the Lower East Side. That makes me think they went to Trinity or Duke, and that they suck.
–S. Portland & Fulton
Guy on cell: This is a superficial neighborhood. They'll only hire you if you're young and hot.
–Hell's Kitchen
Overheard by: didn't know my hood was superficial
Tan guy to messenger guy: So what kind of gay are you? Park Slope gay?
–23rd St & 6th Ave
Guy on cell, triumphantly: We're in the Financial District, bitch!
–Financial District
Thug #1 to old man asking for directions: Ask my man here, he the boy from Queens.
Thug #2: That ain't my fault, nigga! That's just where my momma happened to have me!
–A Train
Overheard by: Jesse
Tourist, looking at buildings across from Central Park: So which one is the Statue of Liberty?
–Columbus Circle
Girl: Are pork chops made of lamb?
–23rd & Park Ave
Overheard by: Nora Claire
Girl to bouncer at bar: Does this place have really awesome bathrooms?
–East Village
Overheard by: bb
Tourist: Is Chinatown closed?
–Canal St
Overheard by: Kristen
Hippie at exhibit for world's most extreme animals: Are they alive?
–Museum of Natural History
Overheard by: gregumsdagreggy
Lady on cell: Times Square's where that ball is, right?
–42nd St & 6th St
Overheard by: tourists rock
Guy: What is this? So I sign up and get a free beer?
–Designated Driver Booth, Citi Field
Overheard by: AJ
Hyper tourist to friend: Wow! A shoe repair shop? Can we go? Please? Come on, don't you have some shoes you want shined?
–74th St & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Raven
Enlightened tourist: Oh! So Broadway's not just one place? It's a series of buildings? Oh, I see!
–46th & Broadway
Tourist woman walking off Brooklyn Bridge: Wow, look at how nice this is! I can't believe we paid only $24 for it!
–Brooklyn Bridge
Overheard by: D-Law
Tourist to another: There are so many yellow cars in New York City.
–42nd & 5th Ave
Overheard by: Lisa
Tourist: Not until high school did I know buses could make turns!
–E Train
Overheard by: Probably had to repeat a few grades
Tourist exiting subway: Did anyone lose a pass? Because I just found one.
–103rd & Broadway
Tourist #1: Wow, this is beautiful!
Tourist #2: Yeah, it is. Now if we could only find Central Park.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Roxie
Asian fag to white hag: So if a natural disaster happened and Long Island had to be evacuated, we'd, like, all be screwed!
–2 Train
Overheard by: Kosi
Woman on cell: You all should come to Long Island. They're fucking civilized over there.
–Battery Park
Overheard by: Smitten Kitten
Hipster on cell, suddenly yelling: Mom, I live in New York City, not Long Island! New York City! Get a map. I live in New York City.
–Greenpoint
20-something blonde on cell: Uh… Long Island… that's on the East Side, right?
–John St & Cliff St
Overheard by: BennyP
Jersey girl to Long Island guys: Oh my god! I've never been to Long Island! I'll need rockstar directions! Oh, and I totally have camel toe!
–51st & 6th
Overheard by: Fanx 4 that
Man #1: This is it, Times Square!
Man #2: Oh, so is this where time started?
–Times Square
Overheard by: Zack
Ozzie #1, leaving bar: We should like, go to church tomorrow.
Ozzie #2: Like in Harlem?
Ozzie #1: Yes! Church there is awesome!
–7th St & Ave A
Overheard by: AgnosticLocal
