Little girl: I hate Jews!
Mom: What? Don’t you ever say that!
Little girl: What, Mom? I don’t like cheese!
–Uptown 104 bus
Overheard by: Barry P.
Little girl: I hate Jews!
Mom: What? Don’t you ever say that!
Little girl: What, Mom? I don’t like cheese!
–Uptown 104 bus
Overheard by: Barry P.
Old lady (looking directly at Hispanic woman and her baby): They don’t speak English and they don’t wanna learn. They just want pay from America. They hate our guts.
[to baby]: Give your Mommy a kiss!
–B6 Bus, Brooklyn
Boy: Yo, that’s an oxymoron. That’s like saying ‘Peter picked a pail of pickles’ and he’s a vegetarian.
–Q111 bus, Jamaica Ave
Russian girl #1: Stop calling me that!
Russian girl #2: What’s wrong?
Russian girl #1: She keeps on calling me Natasha!
Russian girl #2: What’s wrong with that?
Russian girl #1: Because that’s not my name!
–B82 Bus
Russian girl #1: You’re not in my Russian class.
Russian girl #2: Oh, I’m sorry. You have advanced Russian.
Russian girl #1: Everything I have is advanced.
Russian girl #2: Shut up.
–B82 Bus
Businesswoman on cell: If you told me she was 75 or 76, I’d say she looks fabulous. If you told me she was 73, I’d say she isn’t aging well at all.
–M101 bus
Friend #1: I hope I never have an ugly baby.
Friend #2: Well, then don't get pregnant.
–B38 Bus
Overheard by: Paula Lanier
Girl to boyfriend: Two years ago I saw your penis under a bright blue light. And it was small.
–Penn Station
Black guy to black friend: Her father does not want his daughter marrying someone from another race. What, is he scared that the kid will come out black and have a big nose? I'll tell you one thing–he'll have a big dick.
–Bowery & 1st St
Overheard by: Zach B
Man to girl beside him: Mine isn't that big. But it's big enough for what I need it for.
–6th Ave & 9th St
Girl to friend: He had a big penis. It scared me.
–Hunter College
Overheard by: s0uthard
Young teenage boy to another: You're telling me you have an 8.5 inch dick and you don't touch it?
–M21 Bus
Overheard by: zaarah
Bus driver to deranged-looking smelly, yelling guy: Sir, this is your stop. Will you please leave the bus now.
Smelly guy: I pay taxes!
–M2 Bus
Overheard by: richardnixon
Nine-year-old expert on American Girl dolls to would-be collector: Oh, no, not Sarah, you won't get her, she's retired. (about another doll) Good luck finding her, Lindsay retired too!
Would-be collector: Wow, I can't believe all these dolls are retiring!
–M14 Bus
Overheard by: Laurie Gwen Shapiro
