Dorky little white kid: What happens if I fall in the tracks?
Dorky white dad: I guess I'd have to buy a new kid.
Dorky little white kid: That's beastin'!
–Q Train
Overheard by: that *is* beastin'
Dorky little white kid: What happens if I fall in the tracks?
Dorky white dad: I guess I'd have to buy a new kid.
Dorky little white kid: That's beastin'!
–Q Train
Overheard by: that *is* beastin'
Crazy guy: 3 fucking white kids talking to a chink.
Chick #1: Little does he know that’s not the most offensive thing we’ve heard tonight.
Chick #2: Yeah, by comparison it was politically correct.
Chick #1: Yeah, it was kinda a relief.
–4 train
Hobo: This shit happens now! Y2K my ass, the world will end this New Year’s Day, 2006! Coming to a theatre near you…
–A train
Overheard by: Nina
Gangsta kid #1: What, the whole worm? You gotta be kidding, man.
Gangsta kid #2: Yeah, all of it! All eight fucking inches of it!
Gangsta kid #3: You gotta be shitting us. That ain’t possible.
Gangsta kid #2: I ain’t kidding! Ask her if ya don’t believe me!
–2 train
Overheard by: Olga
Guy #1: She won't do it. She won't take my last name. It's really important to me. You just don't get it. It's the psychology of the thing!
Guy #2: You have the same last name.
–Uptown 1 Train
Overheard by: Andrew S
Old lady when boy gives up his seat: What a nice boy! Thank you!
Boy #1: Well, my mom raised me well. It was the belt — she only had to use it once, and then I just knew, you know?
Chick: Ohhh, yeah, for me it was a wooden spoon.
Boy #2: Oranges. She used to throw oranges at my face.
–2/3 train
Overheard by: Katie Koeblitz
Pipelayer #1: I need four more inches.
Pipelayer #2: If I had four more inches, I’d be makin’ movies.
–Bergen Street station
Drunk guy #1: I’m fucked up, man.
Drunk guy #2: Not as screwed as me, right?
Sober guy: What do you mean?
Drunk guy #2: I can’t figure out whose freaking hand is down my pants!
–F train
Teen girl #1: I feel like I need to expose you to some culture. Have you heard the latest Miley Cyrus?
Teen girl #2: That's not the kind of culture I want to be exposed to.
–R Train
Girl: …so you injured your knee running cross-country?
Guy: Yeah, right before the season starts, too…
Girl: So how long did it take you to run across the country?
–F train
Creepy hobo: Oh, you got some ice water, that looks good.
Preschool girl who has just pulled out water bottle: (gives him look)
Preschool teacher: Jasmine, put your water away!
Creepy hobo: She just wants some ice water.
Preschool teacher: Jasmine, do you know that man? Are you talking to him?
Preschool girl: No, he was talkin' to me!
Creepy hobo: We was just talkin' about ice water, nothin' wrong with that.
–N Train
Overheard by: Natalie
