Dunkin' Donuts giant coffee cup mascot: Beautiful Saturday folks, come to the grand opening of Dunkin' Donuts right down the block…
Tourist bro: Dunkin' Donuts sucks!
Dunkin' Donuts giant coffee cup mascot: Get out of here, you asshole!
–Canal & Lafayette
Overheard by: Christian
Guy: Please give me a quickie…maybe in the bathroom?
Girl: You just bought me coffee…let me finish it first.
Guy: The coffee can't wait?
Girl: It's a hell of a lot better than a quickie in the bathroom.
–Mimi's Cafe, Church & Chambers
Lawyer: And what do you sell?
Jury candidate: I used to sell diamonds. Now, in the depression…I sell toilet paper to religious people.
–Centre Street
Girl leaving class: And then we took the contraceptive and put it on our face.
Friend: Boy, this conversation would be awkward out of context.
–NY Law, Worth & Church
Overheard by: Louie Q
Hobo, yelling to crowd: The stimulus plan won't work! The banks have no money! We need to stimulate the banks! You know how? Cocaine and hookers!
–53rd st & 5th Ave
Overheard by: Andrew
Professor: I knew the economy was bad when I saw Saks had layaway. Layaway is for Wal-Mart, not Saks!
–NYU Law
Guy on phone with mother: No, mom! I'm not going to walk on Wall St today. (pause) Because I don't feel like getting hit by a falling body, that's why.
–Broadway & John St
Asian metrosexual to friend entering clothing store: No, I wanna stimulate the economy!
–SoHo
Overheard by: Galatea
Cute young professional: I better be able to go into a bar and say, "I have a job, and it's recession proof. Wanna see what my bed and a Magnum condom look like?"
–72nd & Broadway
Overheard by: Lindsay D.
Guy on cell: I'm telling you, when a place like that switches from Charmin to Duane Reade toilet paper, you know the economy is in the shitter.
–Great Jones & Broadway
Female suit at sink to friend in stall: Oh, yeah! I saw a stainless steel toilet seat cover today, and it made me think of you!
Woman in stall, delighted: Oh, yay!
(both laugh fondly)
–Women's Restroom, Financial District
Overheard by: nowhere near the corrections department..
Woman, pushing baby in stroller through flock of pigeons and hearing him laugh hysterically: Yeah, yeah, sometimes it's the little things in life.
–76th St
Overheard by: jaytro
Guerrilla Top of the Rock marketer: Carpet munching can get you far in life.
–Rockefeller Center
Twelve-year-old girl at Tila Tequila's book signing: This is the greatest day of my life.
–Barnes & Noble, Tribeca
Overheard by: Helene and Kristina
Short fat white woman to tall older man: Well, I really have no problem with spending life in jail. I really don't.
–Father Demo Square
Man, not moving: This place is draining the life out of me.
–IKEA Store
Overheard by: Les Izzmore
Train operator: This is a life-altering bound r train. Prepare to be amazed. Next stop, Nirvana.
–R Train
30-something woman: I thought you lived in Jersey.
30-something man: Do I look like I live in Jersey?
–William St & Platt
Overheard by: Brunni
Little boy, pointing at a subway: Mom, what's this?
Mom: A subway.
Little boy: What does it do?
Mom: It gives you a hard landing space if you trip down the steps.
–Wall Street
Girl #1, walking past NYSC: We should be working out like them…assholes.
Girl #2: It's fine, we are doing more productive things.
Girl #1: More productive than working out? Like what?
Girl #2: Going out, drinking, eating, and shopping!
–Wall Street
