Chick #1: Fucking shit, man, this bitch is kicking our asses!
Chick #2: You just used four different curse words in one sentence.
–Mark Lanes, Bay Ridge
Overheard by: Becka Dash
Waitress: I just don’t get it. Like, how can you be infatuated with me when you don’t even know me?
–Deluxe, 112th & Broadway
Guy #1: Oh my god, I know. I heard Versace is having a huge sale!
Man: Shut up, you damn queer!
Guy #2: He’s just mad because he can’t even spell Versace.
–Grand Central
Overheard by: Nikki Starr
Chick #1: So how was it?
Chick #2: It was bitchfabulous.
Chick #1: Awesome. So it was bitchtastic?
Chick #2: Nice! I like that one. Yeah, it was bitchtastic.
Chick #1: And the coffee?
Chick #2: Bitchalicious.
Chick #1: Hey, I just realized someone might hear us.
–41st & 6th
Man #1: Hey man, why are you hanging out with her? She’s a total dickbag.
Man #2: Dude, I’m imagining like…a bag…of…like…dicks?
–114th & Broadway
(cf. this entry.)
Woman: We were playing Christmas music last night. If you listen to the words, a lot of those songs really mean something.
–Rockefeller Center
Yuppie girl #1: God, this train is so crowded.
Yuppie girl #2: I hate it when the train is packed like this.
Yuppie girl #1: I just want to shove people, but there’s nowhere to shove them to, it’s so crowded.
Guy: Whoa, peace on earth, goodwill toward men, everyone just settle down.
–1 train
Guy #1: …and I’m like, “Holy shit! What’s your fucking problem?” Sorry, excuse my French.
Girl: It’s okay, I’m not offended.
Guy #2: You speak French?
–Coney Island
Overheard by: Kay Baby
Guy: Do you have Bareback Mountain?
–The Strand
Girl: The Columbia Safe Van driver ran a red light and blindsided my cab yesterday!
Guy: I know it’s hard to provide students with a good definition of irony, but honestly.
–Broadway & 116th
Hobo: What’s the best in the nation? Hey you, what’s the best in the nation?
Guy: The best what?
Hobo: In the nation. What’s the best in the nation?
Girl #1: The best what in the nation?
Hobo: You know, like country.
Girl #1: Oh, you mean what’s the best country?
Hobo: Yeah. Nation.
Girl #1: The United States!
Hobo: Wrong!
Girl #2: Red Sox nation!
Hobo: Wrong!
Guy: Nigeria?
Hobo: Wrong! The best in the nation…the best nation is a donation! Gimme a nickel.
–2nd Avenue & 7th Street
Overheard by: Carmen Nobel
