Boy #1: It’s so gross! My aunts pinch my cheeks and call me cute and make, like, cow noises!
Boy #2: Take it from me: wait ’til you get older. I promise, no one will ever call you cute again.
–Prospect Park
Overheard by: Andrea
Boy #1: It’s so gross! My aunts pinch my cheeks and call me cute and make, like, cow noises!
Boy #2: Take it from me: wait ’til you get older. I promise, no one will ever call you cute again.
–Prospect Park
Overheard by: Andrea
Hobo: Hey, you look like Kenny Rogers.
Man: Uh, thanks. I guess that’s a compliment.
Hobo: You’re not a bad looking guy.
Man: Well, let’s not get carried away here.
–Food court, Grand Central
Overheard by: Hobo Appreciation Society
Conductor: Attention downtown passengers. The train that just left the station was obviously not your train.
–6 Train
Woman on cell: Hey, it’s the MTA who should be spanked!
–Rector St.
Overheard by: Ladle
Small girl to mom: I like this train station the best because it has an elevator, and you can see the whole world outside. The whole wide beautiful world.
–Harlem Escalator, 1 Train
Overheard by: Mark Brinker
Guy: I get all my information from subway ads.
–F Train
Overheard by: Thom Cohen
Woman, hearing garbled announcement that E train is running as an F: No! They are takin’ all my E trains!
–E Train
Overheard by: I can has E train?
Crackhead: Make sure to take your newspapers with you on the way out of the train. I’m having company over later and I want it to look nice.
–Franklin Avenue Shuttle
Overheard by: shuttle rider
Queer: Wow, he’s cute.
Straight guy: Yeah… So, do you want to fuck him?
Queer: No, I want him to fuck me.
–Central Park
Teenage girl: So I'm getting better at hooking up with guys and not getting attached! I hooked up with Jake last week, and I don't feel anything at all!
Friend: Yeah, but that's not hard. He's, like, impossible to get attached to. We need to find you a challenge. Who's really cute and cuddly?
Random old man walking in front of them: Pick me, pick me!
–Port Authority Bus Terminal
Overheard by: cute and cuddly
Woman #1: Oh! This guy is so hot.
Woman #2: He’s a druggie.
Woman #1: He’s so hot. Oh God. I can’t even stand it!
Woman #2: Maybe you’ll meet him in rehab.
–MTV Studios, Times Square
Chick: Yeah, the story of my life: he was good looking, I had sex with him twice.
–Manhattan Triple Decker Diner, Greenpoint
Overheard by: Heather Galore
Pushy black woman to employee standing next to portrait studio samples: The next time I come in here, I want to see my daughter's picture up here, because she is beautiful.
–K-Mart, 34th St
Overheard by: EthanK
Guy: There were some pictures taken, involving, like, my penis and Caleb's penis and five other guys.
–4th St & 2nd Ave
Girl: Food is overrated, let's just take a picture and leave.
–100th St & Broadway
Hipster punk girl on phone: Hello? (pause) No, but I know a girl if you're looking. She also puts jelly on her toes. (pause) Who? I once sold a semi-nude photo of myself at an art show once. I think Brendan has a copy of it… no one would ever pay to see my feet. But again, I ask, who were you talking to? (pause) Dave was under the impression that I sold pictures of my extremities for money? That's awesome! I'm going to send him a picture of my elbow!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Ayenbird
Guy: The more bodies, the more pictures. That's what I always say.
–14th St & 7th Ave
Two hobos are checking out a woman walking by.
Hobo #1: You look like an angel fallen from heaven!
Hobo #2: The angel fallen from heaven is the devil!
Hobo #1: Oh…
–Lafayette & Franklin
Lady: When you look in the mirror you should feel excited, not tolerant!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Stinerz
