Curious spectator: Are greyhounds easy to live with?
Greyhound owner: Honey, in the past forty years, I've had three husbands and only one breed of dog!
–Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show
Overheard by: Another Greyhound Lover
Curious spectator: Are greyhounds easy to live with?
Greyhound owner: Honey, in the past forty years, I've had three husbands and only one breed of dog!
–Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show
Overheard by: Another Greyhound Lover
Street vendor: T-shirts, get your “I love New York” t-shirts! Only three dollars. Much better than you'd normally get at a store. T-shirts, get your t-shirts!
20-something guy to girlfriend: Too expensive, babe. Sorry.
Vendor to guy: Yeah, well your girlfriend can have one for free because of how amazing she was last night.
–Times Square
Overheard by: i LOVE new york
Gay guy to friend: I may be gay but I’m not stupid.
–The Flame Diner, 58th St & 9th Ave
Woman to man: But they were only stopping the dumbasses… That’s why they stopped your dumb ass.
–W 66th St & Amsterdam Ave
Overheard by: Susan Volchok
(Blonde is having trouble hailing cab during rush hour)
Gypsy cab driver in town car: No one will take you cuz you’re stupid!
–116th & Broadway
20-something guy to girl: It’s eleven and it will take you till one to get home, then I’ll call you and tell you how stupid you are.
–4th St Subway Station
Overheard by: Glad I’m not dating him
Girl: Alexis, we’ve been over this. You’re stupid.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Crosby
Bimbette, yelling into cell: Yo! Look who you’re talking to–I’m not exactly the smartest person in the world!
–Amsterdam Ave
Overheard by: dumb as a rock
Drunk gay man: I've slept with more men than my mom has!
–Ave A
Overheard by: Let his own mom win that contest
Woman to man: I don't want to be known as the whore of New Yorkers.
–9th Ave & 44th St
Woman on cell: It's just sex. There's no way you guys can ever be permanently tied, or anything.
–Macy's
Preppy, middle-aged woman, about man on iPhone: Who is that whore?
–Bookstore, Brooklyn
Overheard by: -she probably said
Guy: … And you know, I could be, like, the dude that videotapes it.
Chick: I told you already, I don’t even like girls!
Guy: Yeah, well, I’d kind of like it better if you did.
–6th St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: voidoid
Pretty girl to friends: Oh, wait! They have a section for sewing supplies!
Friend: They have an actual sewing supply section here?
Pretty girl: Yeah, it's as big as my dick, but they have one.
–Duane Reade
Passenger #1: What's that movie with Julia Roberts where she plays the runaway bride?
Passenger #2: My Best Friend's Wedding?
–Grand Central
Overheard by: EmLo
Black girl #1: Damn, girl! You're hairy! I dunno if it's cause I'm light-skinned, you're hairy!
Black girl #2: Thanks. Thanks… (walks away)
Black girl #1: You're like a werewolf!
–H&M Dressing Room, Queens Center Mall
Overheard by: hoping shes not a werewolf too…
Drunk girl to random sober guy: Bacon! My hands are like bacon!
Sober guy: What are you, drunk?
Drunk girl: Just very, very, very hungry.
Sober guy: Proceed.
–NYU
Female tutor: Okay, so do you want a soy hot chocolate?
12-year-old student: No, that tastes funny.
Female tutor: So you want cow milk, eh? How would you feel if you were hooked up to a machine all day giving milk?
(student is silent)
Female tutor: You know it's breast milk right?
Student: Yeah.
Female tutor: Moooooo moooooo. (makes suckling noise.) Moooo moooo! (Makes suckling noise)
–Hopscotch
Overheard by: bildita
