Ditzy girl #1: Wait, tell them how you diet!
Ditzy girl #2: Okay, you'll think I'm a total ano, but… I eat lunch… And drink wine for dinner.
Ditzy girl #3: I think that's totally acceptable!
Ditzy girl #4: Yeah, that's fine!
–Rooftop, Hotel Gansevoort
Seven-year-old white boy in huge afro wig, screaming: Peace out, smokers! Peace out, jazz singers! Now, who wants my autograph?
–Playground, Houston St, Soho
Little boy with broken arm: I just won eight gold medals!
–Pier 46, Hudson River Park
Overheard by: skeptical james
Three-year-old boy: The night… why does it hurt?
–Flushing Playground
Six-year-old girl waiting for parents to pay the check, chanting: Hun-ger! Hun-ger! Hun-ger!
–Chinese Restaurant, Park Slope
Overheard by: Kendra
Little boy walking towards LIRR at rush-hour: How are we going to get through all of this?
–Penn Station
Overheard by: i feel the same way
Four-year-old boy: I gotta feelin… that tonight's gonna be a good night… that tonight's gonna be a good night… that tonight's gonna be a good good night!
–Hard Rock Cafe, Times Square
Overheard by: wooohoooo
Little girl, in Cro-Magnon section of museum: Mommy, you must have known these people. They look like you!
–American Museum of Natural History
6-Year-Old girl, holding onto pole and craning neck backwards: I did this once, and my head came off and they had to put a new one on.
Younger brother: That made you dumb. I want ice cream.
–Uptown 1 train
Overheard by: obyun
Tourist #1: How about Italian?
Tourist #2: You know there are perfectly good Italian restaurants back home in Wisconsin. You don't go to New York City for the food.
–42nd & 6th
Overheard by: John
Subway girl in Halloween costume: I was thinking about going as Rosie the Riveter, but, like, girly Rosie the Riveter. In shorts.
–A Train
Trying-to-be-hip mom: What are vampires wearing this season?
–Halloween Adventure
Group of kids in costume, chanting: We want more candy! We want more candy! No more apples! No more apples!
–35th Ave & 29th St, Astoria
Overheard by: kathcom
Man dressed up as Michael Jackson on Halloween: I'm the King of pop, man! I'll touch your children! I'll hang your baby off a balcony!
–Downtown 6 Train
Late-night Halloween-reveler man with dirty cotton beard: I'm Santa. I'm drunk and I'm angry. Fuck balls. Reindeer balls.
–Downtown 6 train
Guy dressed as Billy Mays, in loud infomercial voice: Billy Mays here! Sick and tired of waiting for NJ Transit? Next time, drive! For the low, low price of $20 per toll! Just $4.69 per gallon!
–NJ Transit
Overheard by: J. Ra
Old man to another, about Halloween: I love young girls who dress up like pussies.
–Soho
Overheard by: Edan
Female cashier about to ring up sandwich order: What do you have?
20-something guy: Subway club.
Female cashier, not looking at sandwich: What size?
20-something guy: Mine's 12 inches.
Girl behind in line, to friend: Yeah, I bet.
–Subway Restaurant
Overheard by: Nancy
Fat lady: Last night, I ate an entire box of cookies
Skinny lady: Uh huh.
Fat lady: Like the whole box. I mean, I sort of threw up in my sleep I think.
Skinny lady: That’s–
Fat lady: I mean, there were definite cookie bits in my bed this morning. I’m such a cliche.
Skinny lady: That’s just really…sad.
–Pick a Bagel on Third, Third Avenue
Guy #1: So I had my colonoscopy Tuesday. It was like I lost an hour out of my life.
Guy #2: What do you mean?
Guy #1: Oh that stuff they give you to make you sleepy. It gives you
amnesia or something.
Guy #2: That’s messed up.
Guy #1: So my girlfriend tells me afterwords like five times that they removed a polyp and that they think it could be pre-cancerous. I won’t know until next week or something.
Guy #2: So where do you want to get lunch?
–Wall between Pearl & Hanover
Overheard by: Barb Ordell
Girl #1: Well, college is different, because you're on your own, but in a very structured environment.
Girl #2: Did I tell you about the pancakes?
–4 Train
Hobo: Sorry to interrupt, but I’m starving. Please help me to get some candy and a soda.
Chick: How about a perfectly good pear? You know, if you’re so hungry.
The hobo walks away angry and disgusted; 20 feet later he turns around to give her a dirty look.
Chick: Obviously you’re not that hungry–and it’s called pop!
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: James Lin
