Man: That banana is huge!
Girl: Yeah, I know.
Man: It must have been on steroids.
Girl: No, if it were on steroids, it would have been much, much smaller.
–Deli, 14th & 8th
Overheard by: Tony from Brooklyn
Man: That banana is huge!
Girl: Yeah, I know.
Man: It must have been on steroids.
Girl: No, if it were on steroids, it would have been much, much smaller.
–Deli, 14th & 8th
Overheard by: Tony from Brooklyn
Teacher: Some of the answer choices people picked were really out there. I probably could've put peanut butter and jelly, and people would think, "Oh, damn, I'm hungry, I should pick that."
–Stuyvesant High School
Overheard by: Student
Teacher: Guys, no matter what happens, if you're absent on a test day you must bring in a note! I don't care if you're walking to school and suddenly the ground opens up and you're sucked into candyland–I need a note!
–LaGuardia High School
Overheard by: a note of chocolate?
Acoustics teacher: This only emphasizes how little I know about acoustics. Or rather, how little is known about acoustics.
–Cooper Union, Astor Place
Overheard by: a student is only as good as his t eacher
Teacher to little boy: You ain't gonna die just cause your leg got sprinkled on!
–L Train
Overheard by: Misshellee
Principal: I can see what you're doing…with this bouncing and the little hand on your hip…you're trying to undermine my authority with your bad posture, I can see exactly what you think of my administration.
–Bard High School Early College
Freshman girl #1: Oh my god! Bread! My bread!
Freshman girl #2: Wait…what…? Oh, yeah! Bread! I love you, bread!
Freshman girl #1: Oh, bread. You're my bread.
–114th St & Broadway
Overheard by: pomy
Girl #1: Oh my god! That condom wrapper says “oriental flavor.” What does that even mean?
Girl #2, looking at litter: I think that's a Ramon noodle seasoning pouch.
–Central Park
Running little kid #1: What kind of cheese do you like? Cheese or cheddar?
Running little kid #2: What's the difference?
–Knickerbocker Ave, Brooklyn
Overheard by: da sarkastik ninja.
Redheaded hipster #1, jumping in flour: This is so Brooklyn… Why is there flour in the street?
Redheaded hipster #2: Someone probably was just like “fuck this cake,” and threw it out of their window in frustration.
Redheaded hipster #1: I mean, probably.
–Williamsburg
Son to mom: I have this new kid in my class and the teacher said he is autistic. Where do autistic people come from?
Mom: Autistic chickens, they ate an autistic chicken when he was younger and out he came, out and autistic.
–W Train
Girl #1: Yeah, that French kid’s pretty hot.
Girl #2: His butt is like…it’s like a croissant!
Girl #1: Ohmigod, ew. But yeah, it’s true.
–1 train
Ditzy girl #1: Wait, tell them how you diet!
Ditzy girl #2: Okay, you'll think I'm a total ano, but… I eat lunch… And drink wine for dinner.
Ditzy girl #3: I think that's totally acceptable!
Ditzy girl #4: Yeah, that's fine!
–Rooftop, Hotel Gansevoort
Seven-year-old white boy in huge afro wig, screaming: Peace out, smokers! Peace out, jazz singers! Now, who wants my autograph?
–Playground, Houston St, Soho
Little boy with broken arm: I just won eight gold medals!
–Pier 46, Hudson River Park
Overheard by: skeptical james
Three-year-old boy: The night… why does it hurt?
–Flushing Playground
Six-year-old girl waiting for parents to pay the check, chanting: Hun-ger! Hun-ger! Hun-ger!
–Chinese Restaurant, Park Slope
Overheard by: Kendra
Little boy walking towards LIRR at rush-hour: How are we going to get through all of this?
–Penn Station
Overheard by: i feel the same way
Four-year-old boy: I gotta feelin… that tonight's gonna be a good night… that tonight's gonna be a good night… that tonight's gonna be a good good night!
–Hard Rock Cafe, Times Square
Overheard by: wooohoooo
Little girl, in Cro-Magnon section of museum: Mommy, you must have known these people. They look like you!
–American Museum of Natural History
