We Germans Have Never Lied About Anything

Sales rep: I'm sorry, ma'am, we don't have that specific style here. You could try Saks.
Affluent German woman: The lady at Saks told me to look here! (sniffling) Why does everyone lie to me?

–Bergdorf Goodman, 5th Ave

Overheard by: Blacknoise

Posted on March 15, 2009
9 to 5-ers, Fashion, Foreigners, Lies, Questions, Shopping, Store

Mind If We Take a Photograph with You, Crazy Local Man?

Creepy local guy to tourist couple: Where are you guys from, are you from Boston?
Tourist man: No, we are from France.
Local guy: Oh, you're from France. I knew you were too good looking to be from Boston.

–1 Train

Overheard by: Nathan

Posted on March 13, 2009
Beauty, Couples, Creepsters, Foreigners, On the Subway, Questions, Tourism

In the Way That England and Ireland Are Pretty Much Alike

Woman: Well, technically I live in New Jersey.
British guy: Is that like in New York?
Woman: Pretty much, yeah.

–L Train

Posted on March 7, 2009
Brits, Compare/Contrast, Foreigners, On the Subway, Questions, Women

Many Americans Don't Know the Difference, Either

Gay American guy: For the last time, it's called “working,” not “wanking.”
Gay French guy: “Working,” “wanking,” I am French, I don't know. (proceeds to pinch American gay guy)

–Elevator, 205 Hudson

Overheard by: Harry Cooter

Posted on March 2, 2009
Elevators, Foreigners, Gays and Lesbians, Language Barrier, Masturbation, Punch, Queer guys, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport, Words

Well, Regardless, I Made Him Return Her.

French lady #1: So then he bought me some flowers. This was right before I found out he bought a prostitute.
French lady #2: Oh…how long ago was that?

–Macy's

Posted on February 24, 2009
Foreigners, Gifts, Prostitution, Store, Time, Women

Gotta Keep One Thing About Me Squeaky Clean

French lady: Yes, I was married. We met at a cafe. It was love at first sight. So we got married. But I always knew there was another woman. He had another family. This other woman…
American lady friend, interrupting: Would you like some almonds?
French lady: No, I just brushed my teeth.

–Lincoln Plaza Cinemas

Posted on February 17, 2009
Cleanliness, Foreigners, Infidelity, Love, Marriage, Movie Theaters, Offers and requests, Only in New York, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center, Women

Um, Have You Seen Jackass?

French lesbian: Martin Luther king, was he white?
American lesbian: No. He was black!
French lesbian: Oh I always get him confused with that other president who was the cripple.
American lesbian: Martin Luther king wasn't ever a president.
French lesbian: God! But they have a day for him anyway? America is so pretentious!

–East Village