Big girl: Hahahahaha… I don't know about her.
Skinny girl: Well, she did tell me that she wants me to be her only white friend.
Big girl: Oh, you gotta love that.
–Park Ave & 33rd St
Overheard by: Sara
Big girl: Hahahahaha… I don't know about her.
Skinny girl: Well, she did tell me that she wants me to be her only white friend.
Big girl: Oh, you gotta love that.
–Park Ave & 33rd St
Overheard by: Sara
Airhead girl #1: I can't wait to go to school here. Everyone tells me I'm gonna die. I'm not gonna die!
Airhead girl #2: If anyone is gonna die, it's gonna be you.
Airhead girl #1: I'm *so* not gonna die. This is gonna be so much fun.
–Chelsea
Girl #1: Intelligence is the most important thing, y'know? Is he intelligent?
Girl #2: Oh, yeah. He's like the most intelligent person I've met.
Girl #1: Wow. So what does he do?
Girl #2: He's a model for Hollister.
–West Village
Overheard by: M
Girl #1: So your birthday is tomorrow?
Girl #2: Yeah, it should have been today but I was too much of a fat-ass to fit through my mom's vagina.
Girl #1: What?
Girl #2, yelling: It should have been today but I was too much of a fat-ass to fit through my mom's vagina.
Girl #1: Bummer.
–Spring & Varick
Girl #1: And then I told him no way. I was through with him staying overnight at other girls houses.
Girl #2: But as long as he comes back to your house at night it's okay?
Girl #1: Yup.
–5th St & Lexington Ave
Older man: If you drank a thousand gallons of beer, and then took off your pants…
–79th & West End
Girl to guy with beavers on pants: Excuse me, are those beavers on your pants?
–6 Train
20-something preppy girl on cell: Whenever I'm cheating on my boyfriend, I take off my pants and pretend to be an albino bunny.
–Central Park
Overheard by: that one girl
Guy on cell: If I don't get in her pants tonight, I'm gonna fuck you up!
–1st Ave
Aging drag queen to friend: It's much better than sick obsessions with blond males between the ages of 18 and 25 who always take their pants off to play GameCube.
–The Village
Overheard by: Amused NYU Tischie
Guy on cell: How can you be happy if you're acting like such a bitch all time?
–Melrose Ave & 154th St
Puerto Rican barista, as A-Team music starts playing: The A-Team! Man, that makes me think of when I was young and still happy!
–Grand Central
Overheard by: Chris K.
30-something woman: I'm going to see Transformers. Transformers! Daa naa na naaa! You have to be happy in life, everybody is dying.
–34th St & Madison Ave
Overheard by: Frank Molla
Girl on cell, vehemently: I'm trying brown eyeliner. I hope this makes you happy!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Ashley
20-something girl: Just put some alcohol in me and I'll be happy.
–St. Mark's Place
Girl #1 in bathroom stall: Last weekend sucked.
Girl #2 in bathroom stall: I peed in a Wendy's. That was the highlight of my weekend.
–The Saloon, 83rd & York
Overheard by: gem
Queer: I hate Mexicans, first they jump our borders, then they don't even attempt to speak English.
Tan chick: Fo' reals! I've met some that have been here their entire lives and never bothered to learn English.
Crazy man: Oh my god! Why do you have to be so goddam racist all the time!?
Tan chick: What? I was just making a point, goddammit, I am Mexican!
(five minutes later)
Black lady: Yo! D'shaun! Get yo' ass over here nigga!
Crazy man: I hate black people! They're so goddamn loud, they need to shut up!
–L Train
Overheard by: shocked
Asian girl #1: Hey, did you guys smell that in that building back there?
Orthodox Jewish girl and guy: No, what?
Asian girl #1: It totally smelled like bacon!
Asian girl #2: Yeah! You're right, oh…
Orthodox Jewish girl and guy: Yeah… hm. So that's what bacon smells like?
–Grand Concourse
