Suit: Have you ever been to Ali Baba's?
Brunette: Ew, why would I go there?
Suit: I don't know, I heard the food is good…
Brunette: Oh! Ali Baba the restaurant? I thought you meant Ali Baba the country.
–34th St
Suit: Have you ever been to Ali Baba's?
Brunette: Ew, why would I go there?
Suit: I don't know, I heard the food is good…
Brunette: Oh! Ali Baba the restaurant? I thought you meant Ali Baba the country.
–34th St
Professor: You should go to Trump Towers and pretend to be a prospective buyer, and tour the rooms.
Student: Will they pay for my lunch?
Professor: No.
Student: How bout a scone?
Professor: We're in a recession.
–NYU Silver Center
Overheard by: Alexandra Bailey
Hipster #1: And so then she said, “I'm not even turned on, I just think you're retarded…”
Hipster #2: Oh, dude. Did you guys still have sex?
Hipster #1: Yeah, it was okay.
–Broadway & Houston
Overheard by: Rachel
20-something daughter: Mom, how did you know that dad was the one?
Mom: He was the only one I didn't cheat on.
–LIRR, Penn Station
Skinny hipster to friend: All I'm saying is, if he can fuck a skinny chick why fuck a fat chick?
Random passerby: Shit, that guy ain't gotten pussy in months.
–East Village
Girl: How's your sister?
Doucherocket maximus: She just had a miscarriage, which was good because we didn't want her to breed with him.
–A Train
Overheard by: Sabrina
Guy from Illinois: Where are you from?
Girl: Rome.
Guy from Illinois: Oh, I've always wanted to visit St. Petersburg!
–Queensboro Plaza
Pizza guy #1, after reading Snapple cap: Okay: what's a bird that can swim but can't fly? Seven letters.
Pizza guy #2: Hmmm…a duck?
Pizza guy #1: What? No, seven letters. And a duck isn't even a bird, a duck is a duck!
–Pizza Parlor, Upper West Side
Overheard by: EthanK
Girl #1: This whole Ben situation is really starting to piss me off.
Girl #2: I know! I just don't know what his deal is.
Girl #1: He called me like twelve times yesterday.
Girl #2 (stopping in the middle of Penn Station): He called you? (pauses for a moment) Oh, you mean Ben your boyfriend, don't you?
Girl #1: As opposed to?
Girl #2: Ben from Lost.
Girl #1: Don't talk to me for an hour, please.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: thought it was lost too
Teacher, holding up bag with four apples: Okay kids, how much does this weigh?
Really enthusiastic child: Twenty one pounds!
Teacher: Umm…okay. You think 21 pounds. Right. Anyone else?
–Lincoln Center
