Six-year-old black girl: Want a cookie?
White woman: No, thanks.
Six-year-old black girl: But they taste like black people and white people! See the chocolate? That’s the black people. See the white cookie? That’s the white people. Yum!
–Times Square
20-something dude to another: It's so hard to get laid in this city before 11 pm!
–M-15 Bus
Hottie: I am in New York City. You need to make $250,000 to live like a white person.
–28th & 29th
Overheard by: A black person from Chicago
20-something male to female: So you'd better be prepared. It's like the Times Square of New York.
–16th St & Union Square
Overheard by: Annie B
Middle-aged Hispanic dude to Indian salesperson: This is New York City. Nobody's gonna kill you, okay?
–Rite-Aid
Young gay man: That's what I hate about New York City. It's such a fucking small town.
–14th St & 2nd Ave
Overheard by: molls
Black girl #1, after watching Eliot Spitzer’s apology: Did you see the wife? She was just standin’ there!
Black girl #2: That’s cause she’s not black. If that was me, I’da took off my ring and throwed it at his head.
Black girl #1: Mmmhmm. If she was black, she’d a keeped it real.
–Edward R. Murrow High School
Young man to pretty girl with glasses eating hot dog: That hot dog matches your beautiful glasses!
–Hot Dog Stand, 34th St
Overheard by: gothchick
Dude to girls crossing street: Hey, miss ladies! Youse look nice out!
–Ludow & Stanton
Overheard by: M & J
Guy to girl passing by: El sexy-o! I know how to say it in Spanish, I wanna know how to say it in Caucasian!
–14th St & 1st Ave
Crazy guy: Hey, Snow White! Come talk to Black Beauty. Cuz you know vanilla and chocolate make a good fudge, girl.
–W 110th St
Overheard by: Ashley
Bro standing in sidewalk, harassing passing girls: Hello! I've been waiting all my life for you! Hello, where have you been all my life? Hello, I eat pussy. Hello, I've got money. Hello?
–Union Square
Overheard by: Bruce Lee
Overly talkative man, after seeing “transparent monument” exhibit: I saw a white cloud and a gray cloud but I didn't see no black cloud…If I was Native American I would see a red cloud!
Man's Asian girlfriend: Or a purple one!
Overly talkative man: What?!
–Elevator, The Met
Overheard by: liselle boyette
Old Asian lady to black man, in thick accent: You stay back! (clutches her purse)
(white girl watching shakes head, laughs in disbelief)
Black man: Oh, like you know what's up, white girl.
White girl: Oh, I'm Jewish. She probably hates me, too. (pause, then sadly) Now the whole train probably hates me.
–1 Train
Skinny black chick: If someone says some mo’ fuckin’ racist shit to me, I’ma punch them in the fuckin’ face, yo, and give them somethin’ to be racist about!
Fat black chick: I thought that shit was played out. Racism is ignorancy, yo.
–M train
Overheard by: ignorexia-ists
Angry black lady: That asshole conductor said there is another train coming but did not say when! I need to get to Brooklyn!
Black conductor, trying to calm her down: Why are you screaming at me? I’m just as black as you are!
–2/3 platform, 34th St
Overheard by: Michmeister
Passing black man, to white woman: Yo, sis. You so beautiful.
White woman turns away.
Black man: That’s a compliment. From a black man! To a white girl with no ass!
–106th & Broadway
Overheard by: inge
Drunk-looking girl on cell: … And I just received a postcard of butts! Things are looking up!
–Port Authority
Overheard by: Ladle
Angry soccer mom: Whoever has his or her hand on my ass, you better be one of my kids.
–Staten Island Ferry
Chick on cell: Ew! Ass striations?
–1 Train
Overheard by: Ladle
College girl: I slept at Steve’s dorm. Needless to say, my ass cleared every surface he had in that room. Twice.
–Downtown B Train
Overheard by: Pola
Tall guy on cell: Listen, if you want a white woman to show you her ass all you gotta do is pull out a camera. They drop their panties in a second, at least that’s what I tell the committee.
–Starbucks, Columbus Circle
Conductor over loudspeaker: Aaaand next stop… Yo’ mama’s ass!
–F Train from Queens
Overheard by: Tina K
