Tall skinny white woman in the bathroom: Um, excuse me, this is the ladies room.
Shorter heavy-set black woman: What, are you kidding? I am a lady! (laughs)
Tall skinny white woman, blushing: Um…
Shorter heavy-set black woman: White people, ya either love 'em or hate 'em… Man, I am a woman.
–Jamaica Air Restroom, JFK
Girl #1: So what's your background? What nationalities are you?
Girl #2: Oh, I'm just American. I'm Jewish, though.
–Chelsea Market
White man: Obama's lettin' in all the Jews, man! I'm tellin' you–1.25 million Jews! This park is gonna be overrun with Jews!
Woman with swastika tattoo: When I was in jail… (inaudible) gangrene… (inaudible) elephantiasis of the foot!
–Union Square Park
Overheard by: Helene
Man: You're how old?
Woman: 50.
Man: Wow! You age like a Chinaman!
Woman: What?
Man: Well, a Chinawoman… Umm, you age well
Woman: Thanks?
–Brooklyn
Girl to friend: He's Indian! How can he be homeless?
–Union Square
Crazy Asian lady: I think everyone should experience jail and being homeless at least twice in life, so I need to go to jail again.
–Pinkberry, 32nd St
Suit, screaming: Why the fuck did I go to school? Look at these homeless people. They have a perfect life. Free samples at every corner. Apple Store is open 24/7, which means good shelter. Gahh!
–Union Square
Overheard by: hespeakstruth
Flamboyantly elegant gay guy to female friend: Would you rather lick this entire subway platform or have a homeless woman eat your pussy?
–Times Square
Overheard by: Katie
Guy on phone on Halloween night: So I realize it's last minute, but we need a fourth ghostbuster… and you are black.
–3rd Ave
Overheard by: Supertaint
Teenage girl to group of friends: Ya know, I used to think that John Lennon and John Legend were the same person. Every time I saw John Legend I thought, "damn, that's whack that John Lennon would walk around in black face!"
–M116 Bus, East Harlem
Overheard by: NC
20-something black guy to 20-something white girl: It's New Year's Eve, baby–have sex with a black man tonight! Have sex with a black man on New Year's Eve! (girl laughs, turns to look at him) Hey–it don't have to be me! It's New Year's Eve, have sex with a black man tonight!
–Suffolk & Delancey
Passenger, about ghetto kids who just got off train: Damn, they were like the black Jersey Shore!
–Uptown 2 Train
Overheard by: kids these days
African-American preacher: Everybody singing about Obama. Obaaaaammma. Obaaaaaaama. Obama ain't black, learn the truth, Obama is Al-Qaeda. Obama is Muslim. You know how Obama got them black man lips from smoking them Marlboro cigarettes.
Traditionally-dressed African-American man: You don't know what you're talking about, motherfucker. You were brainwashed by the white man.
African-American preacher: That's racist! The bible doesn't see in black and white. Obama's a homo! Obama's a baby killer!
–2 Train
Bus driver: Everybody move to the back of the bus!
Middle school student being pushed toward the back, indignantly: Yo, I be like the young male Latino Rosa Parks!
–BX 9 Bus
Overheard by: Scheherazade
Black guy on cell: Broadway is all gays and Jews and frankly I am sick of it.
–47th St & 8th
Jewish son: I did not call the rabbi to have him check up on you!
–Penn Station
Overheard by: NosyMormon
Suit on cell: Oh yes, I know all about you. You do crazy things. You eat rice on Pesach.
–Fancy Restaraunt, 79th St
Hobo: I bet if I put up a sign that said "hungry Jew," I'd be getting a ton of money thrown at me.
–98th St & Broadway
Old Jewish woman, exiting store with young woman: I know it's silly, but it was German. They killed six million Jews in Germany. I don't like to buy things that were made in Germany.
–Queens
20-something girl to friend: That Jew laid the spank on her!
–30th Ave, Astoria
