Gay hipster boy: Oh, look at that poor “lost cat” sign. That fur balls never coming back… I can't even figure out my way back home in Brooklyn.
Fag hag: True, that.
–5th Ave & 9th St
Gay hipster boy: Oh, look at that poor “lost cat” sign. That fur balls never coming back… I can't even figure out my way back home in Brooklyn.
Fag hag: True, that.
–5th Ave & 9th St
Girl with snake around her neck to stranger: He doesn't really like people or sudden movements.
Stranger #1: Then why the fuck do you have him out in New York City?
Girl with snake: Because he likes fresh air.
Stranger #1: I repeat, then why the fuck do you have him out in New York City?
Stranger #2: Well, my snake loves people! (grabs his junk)
–Greenwich Village
Overheard by: erin
Latina #1: What's her nationality?
Latina #2: She's a lesbian.
–Houston & Broadway
Boys in group, walking past novelty shop: Booong! Booong! Booong!
Irate friend: That's not a bong, that's a dildo, dumbass!
–6th Ave & W 4th St
Overheard by: theincredilbong
Dude, hitting on girl: So, I'm going to NYU to study for my master's.
Girl, with dim-witted enthusiasm: I want a master's!
–Bleecker & Lafayette
Teenage hipster #1: Wait, I thought those were alcoholic.
Teenage hipster #2: No, they're not at all! I'm so up for Shirley Temples right now!
–6th & Waverly
Overheard by: LizzieD
Dude #1: It's pretty easy to tell when he's depressed.
Dude #2: Oh, of course. He starts crying and doing push ups.
–W 4th St & 6th Ave
Gay guy #1 to girl: I only say these things to you because I'm your best friend.
Gay guy #2: Bitch! I'm her best friend!
Girl: Great. Now you guys are totally going to fight for me.
Gay guy #1: I will fuck him up right here. That's how much I love you.
–14th St & 9th Ave
Crying woman in pink bathrobe and wet hair, as she chases pimp-looking male: I'm taking them to court. I'm taking those motherfuckers to court! I'm calling 1-800-lawyers!
–14th & 8th
Overheard by: Rebecca Meyers
Attractive female law student on cell: Whatever, he can feed me dinner. I know it's "unethical" or whatever…
–11th St & 5th Ave
Blonde Columbia Education School girl to friend: Isn't this supposed to be a graduate school mixer? Why aren't there any law school guys coming up to me?
–Havana Central, near Columbia University
Overheard by: I <3 Gold Diggers Subway hobo: Yeah, thats right. (yelling) I'm gonna be the best judge this town has ever seen!
–6 Train
Overheard by: watching&waiting
Six-year-old girl walking up some wet slippery steps: If I slip, I'm gonna sue.
–33rd & 2nd
Overheard by: Em
Old dog lady, smoking: Me, I've already been spayed.
–Dog Adoption Booth, Brooklyn
Overheard by: PrairieSquid
Old woman to another: Darling, I didn't know your husband was still alive!
–Restaurant, Upper East Side
Elderly black woman, yelling to line of cars honking their horns for Puerto Rican Day parade: Get yo punk asses back to 5th Ave!
–Grand & Graham
Elderly woman, complaining to physical therapist: I keep walkin' like I'm drunk (pause) Cause I am drunk.
–12th & University
Overheard by: tbs
Old lady, after being knocked down by man on bike: You know what… Go to hell! (giggles to herself) I haven't said that in a looong time.
–Union Square
Overheard by: letthesunshine
