Crackhead: Here's how it goes: first you go get your master's for four years, and then after you go to undergrad for four years. That shit takes a long time!
Woman, politely: Oh. I get it!
–1st Ave & 13th St
Crackhead: Here's how it goes: first you go get your master's for four years, and then after you go to undergrad for four years. That shit takes a long time!
Woman, politely: Oh. I get it!
–1st Ave & 13th St
Cop to woman who has just dropped something: Ma'am! (points)
Woman: Oh! Thanks.
Cop: Wait–was that cash?
Woman: Yeah.
Cop: Oh… that was already there.
–Chambers Street Station
Overheard by: Mader
Lady #1: It smells so nice here!
Lady #2: That would be the sewage.
–Canal St
Middle-aged blonde woman: We had a bottle of Nair and beer bottles in the shower. Woke up hungover, with no hair, in my underwear.
Middle-aged brunette woman: That's just sad.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Markle
Young woman: She's a gay prostitute!
Friend: Who told you that?
Young woman: Everyone and her mother knows Miley Cyrus is a gay prostitute! Look at her!
–Park Slope
Asian fag to white hag: So if a natural disaster happened and Long Island had to be evacuated, we'd, like, all be screwed!
–2 Train
Overheard by: Kosi
Woman on cell: You all should come to Long Island. They're fucking civilized over there.
–Battery Park
Overheard by: Smitten Kitten
Hipster on cell, suddenly yelling: Mom, I live in New York City, not Long Island! New York City! Get a map. I live in New York City.
–Greenpoint
20-something blonde on cell: Uh… Long Island… that's on the East Side, right?
–John St & Cliff St
Overheard by: BennyP
Jersey girl to Long Island guys: Oh my god! I've never been to Long Island! I'll need rockstar directions! Oh, and I totally have camel toe!
–51st & 6th
Overheard by: Fanx 4 that
Man: Sorry about yesterday. I got a little carried away.
Woman: That's okay. It was just the man in you.
Man: Yeah. A couple more minutes, and it would have been the man in you!
–23rd St & Park Ave
Overheard by: Marty
Woman #1: Your baby doesn't have shoes on!
Woman #2: He doesn't need shoes, he's part Indian.
–Madison Square Garden
Woman, demonstrating American Sign Language: Meaning is so dependent on the duration of the sign. This (makes gesture) means “thirst,” but this (makes gesture) means “lust.”
Man: I guess it depends on what kind of fluid you want.
–1 Train
Average 20-something woman: So they ordered from that Chinese place for lunch.
Too-skinny 20-something: Isn't that the third time this week?
Average 20-something woman: I don't understand the fascination with eating from the same place three times a week.
Too-skinny 20-something: I don't understand the fascination with eating a meal three times a week.
–L Train
Overheard by: Rina
