Woman trying to drag man into a store: Please, please, please. I'll let you ridicule me in front of society.
Guy: Please, I do that shit already.
–23rd St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Glad he's not mine
Woman trying to drag man into a store: Please, please, please. I'll let you ridicule me in front of society.
Guy: Please, I do that shit already.
–23rd St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Glad he's not mine
Guy, seeing woman: Maya?
Maya: Hey! What are you doing here?
Guy: I don't know, I'm still drunk!
–E 92nd & 3rd
Overheard by: Sarah
Black woman in line for bus: I was in line first! This isn't fair! I was here before any of you!
Suit: Relax, Rosa Parks, you'll get on the bus.
–86th & Lexington
Young man: I wanna be a be a baby daddy!
Young woman: I feel like that would be an expensive hobby…
–Magnolia Bakery, West Village
Headline by: Deadbeat Dad
Runners-Up:
· “…Why I Chose Gold-Digging” – Fresca
· “Actually, the Government Pays For It” – Vasyl
· “Ask Flava Flav” – Emily Leonard
· “I’ll Be Following K-Fed’s “How to Be a Baby Daddy When You’re Broke As Hell” Program” – Meg
· “It’s Only Expensive If You Give a Shit…” – Amber
· “No Way, There’s Going to Be a Stimulus Plan For That Too!” – Derek
· “OK, Lemme Try This Another Way: I Wanna Fuck You.” – Sim Etrias
· “Who Said Anything About Financial Support?” – Keith the Geek
· “Yachting Is an Expensive Hobby; Baby Daddying Can Be Done on the Cheap!” – Drew
Young woman, entering restroom, to Starbucks employee standing outside: Oh, I thought you were waiting to use it.
Starbucks employee: No. I'm the bathroom genie. I make the magic happen.
–Starbucks
Woman: Well, technically I live in New Jersey.
British guy: Is that like in New York?
Woman: Pretty much, yeah.
–L Train
Bouncer on phone: I don't care if they is balding, got big guts or little dicks!
–Houston & Lafayette
Overheard by: chiddox
Flaming gay man to lover: You have a small dick that never gets erect, and you are not in my will!
–Avenue St John & Kelly Streets, Bronx
Overheard by: Li'l Squeaker
Hobo: Stop controlling my eyeballs to look at your dick!
–Times Square
30-something man: Waaaaait, did they say "dick in cider" or "dick inside her"?
–7th St & St. Mark's
Overheard by: Juicy
High school kid: I wish I had two dicks. (pause) So both of my hands have something to do in class.
–Q27 Bus Stop
Overheard by: cough.cough.cough
Woman on phone: It's not about you, it's about your small dick.
–Times Square
Girl to friend: So you're going to tutor his dick, right?
–University & 10th St
Announcer guy: Hey girl, I love your face. And Charmin loves the other end!
–Charmin NYC Restrooms, Times Square
Overheard by: Nathan
Drunk boyfriend: Thanksgiving is over, and so is our love!
–Grand & Leonard, Williamsburg
Overheard by: fanny
Subway busker, about next song: This is not a love song. The reason that this is not a love song is because I don't like her anymore.
–Time Square
Philosophy professor on last day of class: If you love something, set it free. And if it flies away, run after it and kill it.
–City College
Overheard by: Dan Lurie
20-something guy to friend sharing iPod with him: I would do anything to live there…I would pretend to be in love.
–Downtown 6 Train
Overheard by: dallas
Woman on cell: I will skin and tar you. (pause) Oh, I love you!
–W Broadway & W 3rd St
Man: Say, how's your tapeworm doing?
Woman: Oh, don't even get me started!
–R Train
Overheard by: Chad L.
Cashier: Hi ma'am, did you find everything you wanted?
Big funky black lady: Yeah, I guess so. Too bad you guys don't sell husbands here.
–Bath and Body Works, Park Ave & 23rd
Overheard by: thinking the same thing
