College dude: No, seriously, she tries to dress like you.
Hippie girl: You think?
College dude: Yeah, but she can't pull it off because you dress like a hipster. In fact, any attempt she makes is futile.
–Computer Lab, Pace University
Overheard by: Conformity is Futile!
Waspy girl #1: My mom and I are in a huge fight right now.
Waspy girl #2: Really? That sucks.
Waspy girl #1: Yeah, especially because to punish me she's taking me shopping.
Waspy girl #2: What?
Waspy girl #1: We go to all these stores and she makes me try on all these clothes while she makes comments about how fat I'm getting. And then she doesn't buy me anything because according to her I'm a whale.
Waspy girl #2: Wow.
Waspy girl #1: Yeah, I know. And people wonder why Wasps tend to be such alcoholics.
–Metro-North Train
20-something girl #1, about energy drinks: Everyone drinks them. I figure if they were so bad they'd make them illegal.
20-something girl #2, sarcastically: Yeah… like cigarettes and alcohol are illegal.
20-something girl #1: Heroin is illegal. That's definitely bad.
–Central Park
Girl: Wow, you are really tall!
Guy: Yeah, I know…
Girl: No, seriously, you're like as tall as that Ying Yang guy!
Guy: What? Who? Oh, you mean Yao Ming?
Girl, laughing: Oh yeah, whatever, I don't watch baseball.
–NYU
Indian counter-person #1 to girl buying beer: Do you want a straw?
Girl: No, thanks.
Indian counter-person #2: I hear you get more fucked up if you drink it from a straw.
–Spring & Mott
Overheard by: Clannah
Bimbo #1 with yoga mat: Have you ever done the two-hour boot camp workout thing?
Bimbo #2 with yoga mat: No, but I hear it's as bad as being in a contraception camp.
–72nd & Columbus
Young guy: If I see another blue penis it would be too soon!
–42nd St
Overheard by: alecko
Girl on cell: She just bought a merkin… It was pink, you know, to match her hair. (pause) Would you want to rub toxic dye down there?
–Williamsburg
Girl to another: Just because he is wearing a different colored shirt, he's still the same guy.
–Central Park
Flamboyant guy, shouting to girl in very short orange dress: I have that same orange dress in purple!
–South Street Seaport
Overheard by: Green Star
Mother to four-year-old wearing pink shirt and shoes: Not *everything* has to be pink, honey.
–Rite Aid, Carroll Gardens
Overheard by: Sunny
Woman on cell: And then he threw the wig and car keys at him, and to me, that says family!
–West Village
Overheard by: Kate S
20-something on cell: Yeah, I Rickrolled my cousin's Bar Mitzvah last night. No, he didn't get it, the sheltered little Short Hills prick.
–MoMA
Overheard by: Trevor
Young guy in deli to friend: So getting support from my parents is like dealing with a record label. You have to create a buzz, make it seem like you're doing something, or they don't want to be involved with you.
–Frank's Deli
Drunk girl: That's my brother! But we're both only children.
–Pieces Bar, Christopher St
30-something man to 30-something woman: When are we ever going to find a time when both of our parents aren't home?
–7th & 1st
Burly guy in cafe: Mind mapping's not a game. It's a reality.
–Ave A & 11th St
Overheard by: Anna P.
Cop to another: Some people play checkers, some people play chess. You, son, you play checkers.
–New Street & Beaver
Black librarian with dreads: In the game, you gotta give the black girl all your stuff, all your valuable stuff. You give it to her to hold and then you take it from her. That's how you get the trophy.
–Bronx Library
Drunk guy in the cafe car: Listen! Just because I'm white doesn't mean I can't play dominoes!
–Acela Train
Overheard by: Someone who can't play dominoes
Girl sitting with friends listening to music: Ohmigod, the guy who sings this song is sooooooo ugly!
Friend: Really?
Girl: My family said I look like him.
–Central Park
