Customers

Customer to cashier: I love that name, “Sierra.” My parents were going to name me Sierra Dawn if I was a girl, because they really wanted their last child to finally be a girl. But I wasn't. Now I use Sierra as my drag name.

West Hollywood, California

(a couple at the checkout counter buying nylons)
Girl: I’m really excited for these tights.
Guy (excessively excited): Me too!

Halifax
Nova Scotia
Canadia

[A young woman in a wetsuit and a young man in normal clothing are standing near the packaged meats.]Female employee: Can I help you with anything?
Young woman: Oh, no thanks, we’re just admiring the bacon.
Female employee: Oh. Okay! Have a nice day!

Vons
Ventura, California

Customer, looking at strange photograph: Wow, that baby sure does have a lot of hair!
Cashier: I told my wife not to put a wig on that baby, but she just wouldn't listen.

Birmingham, Alabama

Customer: I’d like some tea… Organic mint, please.
Barista: Okay, we have organic lemon and organic Earl Grey.
Customer: Um… Actually, I wanted the organic mint.
Barista: Oh, we have that, too.
Customer: Okay, then. That’s the one I’ll have.

Design Coffee shop, University of Washington
Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Just Me

Man to store employee: It's one of those real estate investment books, the yellow ones.
Employee: Let's see, follow me… Is this what you were looking for?
Man: No, no, that's the one for idiots, I want the one for dummies.

Barnes & Noble
San Diego, California

Overheard by: Lisa

Customer: I'll have a large hot chocolate, a chocolate glazed donut, and a plain bagel with smoked salmon cream cheese on the side.
Drive-thru grunt: What did you say for the cream cheese on the side?
Customer: Smoked salmon.
Drive-thru grunt: Oh, we don't have that kind.
Customer: What kinds of cream cheese do you have?
Drive-thru grunt: We have chive. Chive is like smoked salmon.
Customer: Uh…yeah.

Bangor, Maine

Overheard by: just wanted a coffee

Male customer: Since you're new, I will order slowly. (proceeds to do so)
Cute female barista, after writing down: Okay, that wasn't so hard!
Male customer: Oh, I'll give you something hard… Oh, wait, did that come out wrong?

Roswell, Georgia

College kid: Excuse me, what is the difference between these potato pancakes and a potato latka?
Grocery stocker: Um, I don’t know what a latka is, so I couldn’t tell you.
College kid: A Jewish potato pancake.
Grocery stocker: Well, those potato pancakes are German.
College kid: I wonder if a German Jew would eat them.

Sendik’s Grocery Store
Grafton, Wisconsin

Overheard by: Arthur

Woman: So, I want a small frozen turkey.
Meat guy: Okay, just right over here.
Woman: Ewww… What's wrong with this one?
Meat guy: Sorry?
Woman: Well, is something missing?
Meat guy: Um… No.
Woman: Well, what is this “grain fed” business??
Meat guy: Oh, that means it's fed with grains.
Woman: Oh! (picks up turkey and leaves)

Grocery Store
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Matt C