Young son: Daddy, look! It's a doggy!
Preppy father: Yeah, it's a dog, son. Give it a break.
Bystander: Father of the year!
–Union Square
Overheard by: likes dogs
Young son: Daddy, look! It's a doggy!
Preppy father: Yeah, it's a dog, son. Give it a break.
Bystander: Father of the year!
–Union Square
Overheard by: likes dogs
Middle-aged woman to another: Oh! Look at those nuts, Theresa!
–Holiday Market, Union Square
Four-year-old girl, holding giant lollipop: Daddy, look! It's so big I can't get my mouth around it!
–Gristedes, University Place
Overheard by: M
Girl to friend bending down to pick something up: You are now the official bender in this relationship.
–Bard High School, Queens
Overheard by: Sunny
Woman reading menu outside: I love fish tacos!
–Chavela's, Prospect Heights
Overheard by: zack g.
Girl on cell: Well, my mouth is really small, you know? So I needed something really wide to hold it open.
–1st Ave & 5th St
Overheard by: Asaywhat
Railway announcer: This is the train to Ronkonkoma, next stop Jamaica, Queens.
Little boy to dad: See, dad… I told you he said “yarmulke”!
–LIRR
Overheard by: Charlotte
30-something woman on phone: Ma! Jesus, ma. I totally agree with you. (pause) Yeah, he told me to come over when the house was done. (pause) Yeah, fixed up. Jesus, ma. (groan) Yes. No! I'm not a slut. Ma!
–Jackson Heights
Overheard by: maria
Teen girl to friend: I was living with my grandmother and my girlfriend was studying social work, I was sleeping with men at this time–but I wasn't a slut or anything.
–Westside Tavern, 23rd & 8th
Girl on cell: How many guys did I sleep with? Thirty, forty?
–Pearl St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: CAC Baby from The Glebe
Father on phone with daughter: I didn't raise you to be a fucking whore. If I wanted you to be a whore you think I would've paid for your goddamn degree?
–Washington Square Park
High school freshman to friend: My Spanish teacher called me a slut!
–61st St & Amsterdam Ave
Little boy, pointing at NYPD helicopter: Daddy ! What's that?
Dad: That's a ghetto bird. (then to friends) Normally it's native to neighborhoods with a lot of black people… Wonder what it's doing here?
–Citifield Stadium
Overheard by: Matt F.
Man with double-wide stroller: Everybody wants a muffin… Everybody wants a muffin, but nobody wants to work for it.
Kid: But mama does…
–Bookstore, Columbia University
Overheard by: Pat
Whiny tween: Daddy, I just got hit in the eye.
Yuppie dad: Oh! You did? Who hit you in the eye?
Tween and mom: Mommy did.
–Prospect Heights
Overheard by: Andrea
Small boy, in genuine distress: Daaaaddy… It's dis-gust-ing in heeeere.
Father: I know. Come on, let's do our business.
Small boy: It smells like a lion pooped on the floooor! I wanna leave.
Father: Me, too.
–Men's Bathroom, Bronx Zoo
Little girl walking in wedding dress: Where now?
Dad: Okay, so we'll take the stairs to the subway and…
Little girl: Oh no! Not the stairs. No! I'm not taking the stairs. You can't make me. And the subway…? (scoffs at dad)
–Port Authority
Overheard by: WalkonBystander
Woman sitting in front of bar with friends: I approached motherhood like I approached my art…
–9th St & Ave C
Overheard by: Juliet
Street artist to tourist: I don't have empathy, I paint empathy.
–Soho
Hipster arty type to another: She deserves to be roofied; her prints are horrible.
–Pratt Institute
Hipster to another, at Georgia O'Keefe exhibit: That's a lot of vaginas.
–Whitney Museum
Four-year-old boy to father, at 17th century furniture room: This place gives me the creeps!
–Metropolitan Museum of Art
Overheard by: Me too
Mother to child: I seen that picture you did of that boy kissing that girl. (pause) Darren, your art shit is going far!
–Times Square
