Young woman: Dude, you forgot your purse at my house!
Flamboyantly gay man: It's not a purse, biatch, it's a satchel.
–Bed-Stuy
Overheard by: anna
Young woman: Dude, you forgot your purse at my house!
Flamboyantly gay man: It's not a purse, biatch, it's a satchel.
–Bed-Stuy
Overheard by: anna
Girl: Fall Out Boy would fuck me for my shoes.
Friend: Yo, I would fuck you for your shoes.
Cashier: Lemme see your shoes? [Nods] I’d fuck you for your shoes.
–Chinatown
Overheard by: Myshoes
Street salesman: Come over, buy yourself a belt. If you got a big butt, buy two belts.
–Brooklyn Heights
Girl #1: I mean, when you think about it, he’s really not that good looking, and kind of an asshole. I don’t even know why I’m so attracted to him.
Girl #2: Because he’s here…and you’re you.
–Starbucks, 45th & Lexington
Overheard by: Anne O.
Girl on cell: Yeah, baby, I’m all alone in my apartment on my bed. I’m taking my panties off now. Mmm, I’m touching myself, thinking of you. I’m all wet for you, baby.
–outside Starbucks, 54th & Broadway
Suit on cell: Yes, I’m wearing suspenders.
–Wall & Broadway
Overheard by: Alexis
Guy #1: With that hat and beard you look like a Jewish rabbi.
Guy #2: Dude, it’s not cool to make fun of people who aren’t Jewish.
–Port Authority
Overheard by: Justin
Guy: Why are you wearing tuxedo pants?
Jon Stewart: I want to raise my baby formally. It’s black tie in the
house.
—Daily Show studios, 51st & 11th
Overheard by: Jess McGins
White teenage boy to black teenage boy: She thinks I am a rapist or something.
(black teenage boy giggles) Which I am cool with, you know what I mean?
–Bay Ridge Ave & 4th Ave
Brunette Guido girl: Ohmigosh, you would love this girl, she's like, the only cool blonde person. This one time she was just like "Dude, can we just do the peace-and-love thing? Cause, I don't know how to fight."
–LIRR
Overheard by: whaaasgood
Fashion intern: I had swine flu last year, before it was cool.
–Cafeteria, Hearst Tower
Overheard by: interns are our future
Bike rider on phone, walking with girlfriend: I don't have his number, but you can call Tom* and go down there. Those guys are pretty cool. You can just go down there and give them a prostate massage.
–Riverside Park
Middle-aged woman #1: Well… They make very good friends.
Middle-aged woman #2: And fashion advisors!
–Ladies Room, Theater
Overheard by: Hannah
Woman #1: Oh, the hell I had to go through with that fucker for this Tiffany!
Woman #2: I know.
–E 41st St & 3rd Ave
Overheard by: penetrode
