Metrosexual: Have you gone to that hair salon I told you about?
Scruffy artist: I walked by…
Metrosexual: It’s beautiful.
Scruffy artist: I can’t go in. It’s too hipster.
Metrosexual: No! It’s anti-hipster.
Scruffy artist: Well, I can’t do the cultural math.
–Ft Greene apartment building lobby
College boy: I used to work with those people who dress up as cartoon characters.
College girl: Ohhhh! You mean furries?
–Pratt Institute
Hobo: When I point, everybody smell collard greens.
–6 train
Dude #1: Easy, Big Poppa, you’re stepping on my shoes.
Dude #2: Sorry, it’s a little crowded in here.
Dude #1: I can tell.
Dude #2: But I love it when you call me Big Poppa.
Dude #1: Seriously, get off my shoes.
— train
Thug, talking about fanny pack: What is that? Your change purse?
Thugette: Nigga, that's my insulin!
–1 Train
Man #1: I don’t want black shoes. They get too hot in the summer.
Man #2: That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. How much surface area of your shoes actually faces the sun?
–Office, East 45th Street
Overheard by: l.k.
Asian chick: So that’s it, then?
Asian guy: Yep.
Asian chick: We’re breaking up, then?
Asian guy: Yep.
A few minutes pass.
Asian chick: Hey, you’d look good with that girl up there in the pink checked coat.
–Empire State Building
Overheard by: Taffy Doublewide
Man: What’s that black band on your wrist for? Everyone has those things now. Is it like Kabbalah? Or to cure cancer?
Woman: It’s a hairband.
–Flight out of LaGuardia
Girl: Forget it, I’m taking these off.
Guy: Why, baby? Let me see ’em.
Girl: No, they make my butt look like a white person’s ass.
Guy: What’s that?
Girl: They make my ass look flat like a white person’s!
Guy: Baby, I can’t hear you.
–Wet Seal, Manhattan Mall
Overheard by: E-Bar
Teen bimbette #1: Oh my God, she is like my idol!
Teen bimbette #2: I know right, mine too!
Teen bimbette #1: Oh my God! We should totally dress like her!
–Soho
Overheard by: rachel whited
