Dude: What? So moving furniture didn’t turn you on?
–Spring & Lafayette
Overheard by: Thoms
Dude: What? So moving furniture didn’t turn you on?
–Spring & Lafayette
Overheard by: Thoms
Teen boy: Hey, do you know if there is a real Chinese food place around here?
Teen girl: Yeah, one that’s not Japanese?
–Sushi restaurant, 81st & York
Overheard by: j.pie
Girl: That’s funny, I thought you were a finance major.
Guy: I couldn’t stand it. It’s like… numbers and shit.
–6 train
Girl: He had Tetris.
Guy: Tetris?
Girl: You know, when you twitch involuntarily.
Guy: Oh, you mean Tourette's syndrome!
–6 Train
Girl: We used to go out–he was wonderful–so interesting, caring, funny, and great lover. But I dumped him because he was gay.
Guy: Are you sure?
Girl: …Well, maybe he wasn’t a gay after all…Yes, he definitely wasn’t.
–14th & 6th
Overheard by: goga
Suit on cell: No, I’m not coming in today…I’m on the Upper East Side. There’s all this traffic from the Pope’s "Don’t sodomize the kids" world tour.
–83rd & Lex
Guy at bar: Most Popes hate Jews.
–6th and D
Gamer kid: Yeah, I was in DC this weekend with the Pope… Yeah, I saw that muthafucka.
–218th & Park Terrace West
Overheard by: Kelley
Old lady, about young girl: Oh, she looks nice. She’s wearing Pope shoes.
–Carmine St
Overheard by: arctinus
Ghetto guy #1: Yo, I want a premature baby.
Ghetto guy #2: Good thing you goin' to LA!
–Vanessa's Dumplings, Lower East Side
Overheard by: Ria
Girl on cell: It's 111 Columbus. No, Columbus as in the guy who discovered the world.
–Houston & Broadway
Guy to group: Napoleon is the funniest guy ever!
–Fordham University, Bronx
Overheard by: Krisztina
Hipster: Europe is cool, you know, because the towns are like soil samples when you look at them. You can pull the historical soil sample and see the layers of crustaceans and stuff.
–Party, Park Slope
20-something girl to friends: Mix tapes are like a little piece of history.
–Park Slope, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Jo King
Male professor: Remember for your papers, John Brown was hanged, not hung. He might have been hung too but that is a different topic.
–Fordham University
Overheard by: Go Rams!
Guy on cell, screaming : Did you or did you not give that guy a blowjob in the parking lot?
–3rd Ave & 10th St
Overheard by: JC
Hot girl talking to hot friend: He said blowjobs are like flowers for guys. Do I get flowers everyday? No! So why should he, right?
–C Train
Screaming bag lady: He asked me to suck his dick. I don't suck dick, I'm homeless.
–125th St
Overheard by: Reilly
Guy on cell: How's her gag reflex? Because that's a great way to make up for stupid.
–5th & 83rd
Overheard by: Kelly
Guy to another: Greg, do you want your cock sucked tonight? Then get in the car! (other guy hastily gets in car)
–The Village
(waiting for a train near the last few cars)
Guy: This train looks pretty crowded.
Girl: Yeah. Good thing Jackie isn’t with us.
Guy: What do you mean?
Girl: If Jackie can’t ride in the first car, she’ll wait for the next train.
Guy: Why?
Girl: “Because you get there first!” she says. Jackie! The whole train gets there at the same time!
–Pen Station
Overheard by: GregLarry
