Female security guard to sneezing kid: Cover your mouth when you sneeze. We don't need no swine flu in here.
(other library patrons laugh)
Female security guard: Yeah, I said it!
–Brooklyn Public Library
Overheard by: The City Planner
Female security guard to sneezing kid: Cover your mouth when you sneeze. We don't need no swine flu in here.
(other library patrons laugh)
Female security guard: Yeah, I said it!
–Brooklyn Public Library
Overheard by: The City Planner
Excited young children: Look, it's a polar bear!!!
Jaded mother, in thick New York accent: Get a good look; they're not going to be in the world much longer.
–Central Park Zoo
Overheard by: Sarah
Ten-year-old girl #1: You suck at this game!
Ten-year-old girl #2: One day it will come in handy!
–Summer Camp, Staten Island
Overheard by: never know what you'll over hear as a camp counselor
Ebullient cashier: Good morning, sir!
Yuppie, trying to control his two rambunctious children: What's so fucking good about it?
–Union Market, Park Slope
Overheard by: Thinking the same thing
Conductor: We have eleven cars today. If we only have five cars tomorrow, don't have short term memory loss and say, "five cars, this happens all the time."
–Metro North
Hot dog vendor to guys standing behind stand: 100 times I've fucked, and have 98 kids.
–Outside Metropolitan Museum of Art
Teen hipster girl to friend : On a scale of one to ten, how many cars are coming?
–33rd St & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Erika
Angry man on cell: Don't talk to me like that! I'll leave you! I will leave you! You know how many women there are in this world? (pause) A thousand!
–45th St & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Native Ear
NYU professor: Stay away from drugs. (pause) Unless they're recreational and you know what you're doing!
–NYU Silver Center
Overheard by: liz
Tall kid: I don't like opiates in general. I'm for up, not down. At any rate, I have a fucking honky horn!
–Hunter College High School
Guy: I think I need to do more shrooms and acid.
–Union Square Park
Overheard by: Jordan
Girl to friend: You should try something natural, like shrooms.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Julie
Druggie clerk on cell: I mean: come on, man! That's my fucking apartment. If he wants to smoke weed or shoot up in my apartment, it's like, whatever. But crack? No. That's my fucking home. Seriously.
–St. Mark's Place
Overheard by: Emmy
Peter Greene (Zed from Pulp Fiction): What happens in your life if you don't have your gallbladder?
–The Library, East Village
Girl on cell: My life is cursed, Cordelia!
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Charlotte
Hobo carrying tall bamboo pole: What a life. Who wants to shoot me in the back?
–Strawberry Fields, Central Park
Overheard by: Publius
Girl to friend: So they, like, told me I should come up to the school for two days and, like, go to some dinner on the first night and then do campus activities the next day. But I don't know. That's, like, two days of my life.
–6 Train
Overheard by: Bystanding Citizen
Little girl to mom: It's okay, mom. I'll just go on and have a good life and never learn how to whistle.
–80th St & Amsterdam Ave
Little boy to sister: What's the perimeter of a rectangle?
Sister: Big foot!!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Bruce Lee
Black dude: When I was a kid, I use to fake choke, so my mom would give me the Heimlich maneuver, whenever I wanted a hug. (pause) You know, one of those “just because” hugs.
–Williamsburg
Overheard by: Mike D
Horribly dressed woman at kebab stand, holding her wallet: So, you wanna see my kids or what?!
–28th St & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Ren
