That Red Ribbon on Her Collar Is Just Style

Woman #1 (after long phone conversation): Oh, I love that woman.
Woman #2: So no Aids?
Woman #1 (after pause): No, of course my cat doesn't have Aids, how could she have Aids?
Woman #2: No, of course she's just a stressed out cat!

–Mamouns

Posted on March 23, 2009
AIDS, Gay Man's Best Friend, Love, Questions, Restaurants & Cafes, Women

Oh “Bush” Puns, We'll Miss You Most Of All.

Guy: So I was talking to this hot girl the other day, but then she told me she liked Bush.
Girl: Oh…she's a lesbian?
Guy: No! Bush!
Girl: Oh, the band.
Guy: No, Bush! She's a Republican!
Girl: Wait. What?!

–Times Square

Overheard by: J.E.

Posted on March 23, 2009
Gays and Lesbians, Girls, Guys, Music, President, Questions, Times Square, Vagina

Write That Down.

Guy #1, studying for biology: Bread makes you shit.
Guy #2: Why?
Guy #1: Because it's bread.
Guy #2: Genius.

–NYU Palladium

Overheard by: Zacharia

Posted on March 23, 2009
Food, NYU, Poop, Questions, Science, Students

I Told the Real Estate Agent Blue Was My Signature Color

Student: It's gonna be Halloween, aren't you worried about the Bloods' initiation?
Teacher: Nah. I'm good, my neighborhood's Crips.

–Brooklyn Public School

Overheard by: trinity

Posted on March 22, 2009
Brooklyn, Celebrations/Parties, Questions, School, Students, Teachers/Professors, Violence

Then You Can Guess Which One By the Stains on the Carpet!

Guy #1: You're going to class? This'll be great, I'll get to make lunch and then I'll masturbate!
Guy #2: Dude, I'm gonna be here till one.
Guy #1: Well…one, then.

–NYU Palladium

Overheard by: Zacharia

Posted on March 22, 2009
Food, Guys, Masturbation, NYU, Questions, School and studying, Time

The Day Donald Duck Resolved to Be Taken Seriously

Undergrad #1: Yo, man, where are you running to?
Undergrad #2: Class!
Undergrad #1: Yo, why are you wearing pants?

–Fordham University

Overheard by: eternal student

Posted on March 22, 2009
Clothing, Fordham, Questions, School and studying, Students

In a World Without Wiki…

Middle aged drunk woman: Excuse me sir, do you know what nasal douching is?
Random 20-something guy: Uh, I think it's when you stick your nose up in there and blow it out or something.

–Grand Central

Posted on March 22, 2009
Body Parts, Drunks, Grand Central, Medicine, Men, Questions, Stupidity, Women

Baloo Was So Wearing the Pants in That Relationship

Black-haired girl: Have you ever noticed how Disney characters hardly ever have mothers?
Blonde girl: Yeah, word! Nemo, Cinderella…
Black-haired girl: Jasmine, Belle, Mowgli from The Jungle Book…but then again he didn't have pants either, so I don't think he matters.

–New School, 13th & 2nd

Posted on March 21, 2009
Clothing, Disney, Girls, Parents, Questions, School, Union Square and East Village

Is This Political Science, Sir?

Physics teacher: So the formula for work is w = fd, or force times displacement.
Student #1: How are we supposed to remember that?
Student #2: “Fd”–“first dog”! Like Obama!
Student #3: W = fd, White House's first dog!

–Stuyvesant High School

Posted on March 21, 2009
President, Questions, Race, School and studying, Science, Students, Stuyvesant, Teachers/Professors, Words

Cell Service Is Lousy in Heaven, but Great in Hell

Bimbette: Yeah, I never really heard from him since his funeral.
Friend: Did you say his funeral?
Bimbette: Yeah, it was sooo sad.
Friend: His funeral?
Bimbette: Sheesh, bitch, get a hearing aid!

–Penn Station

Overheard by: Joel Moore

Posted on March 20, 2009
Bimbettes, Death, Friends, Insults, Penn Station, Questions, Weirdness

Questions