Tall guy: Maybe I should just move to his pad…
Short guy: You can’t live with him, you’ll never get any work done with all the strippers and piles of coke everywhere. He lives too large for me.
Tall guy: [long pause] Yeeeaaah!
–PATH
Overheard by: green eyed evesdropper
Girl: There’s a deli now.
Guy: They moved to Delhi?
Girl: No, there’s an Israeli deli there now, which tells you something about the scene.
Guy: I thought they moved to Delhi “where the trance scene is happening”.
–27th street office
Guy: Let's make a really bad decision tonight. Let's hang out.
Girl: Yeah!
–21st St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Christian
(teen comes onto train and does the whole spiel about selling M&Ms for his school, walks up and down the car, no one buys anything)
Teen: I'm also selling weed.
Guy: Really?
Teen: No. But I should go back to dealing, this shit doesn't pay.
–A Train
Overheard by: Graham Davis
Guy: So let me get this straight. First, you sleep with my brother, then you get pregnant, then—
–LES
Partially Overheard by: Matty Sallin
Metrosexual guy: If I was some fish…
Girl, not looking up from her bus schedule: Grammar just cried.
Metrosexual guy: I don’t follow you.
Girl: Good, because if you did, I would have to have you arrested.
Metrosexual guy: I am so confused.
Girl: Do the words ‘you are an idiot’ confuse you?
Metrosexual guy: I hate you.
–28th & 5th
Guy: Did you hear that Sam broke up with Angie?
Girl: Good for him! [Guy stares at her in disbelief.] Uh… I mean… Oh, poor Angie!
–NYU dining hall
Asian guy #1: Hey, would you date a female version of yourself?
Asian guy #2: No way bro, I don’t date white bitches.
–Columbia University
Guy #1: What did you do with her after dinner?
Guy #2: We went back to my place for game of “just the tip.”
–4th St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: Aussieguy
