Girl on cell: Oh my god, I’m shopping with my mom, and she’s shopping for dildos!
–8th & University
Girl on cell: Oh my god, I’m shopping with my mom, and she’s shopping for dildos!
–8th & University
Teacher: Tyler*, your mom is here.
Tyler: Yay! … Wait, which one?
–Citigroup Children’s Center, 399 Park Ave
Overheard by: sarita92282
Six-year-old girl: I just want this, I’m on a diet.
Little brother: You’re on a diet?
Six-year-old girl: Yeah, I only had fruit for lunch and dinner.
Little brother: Oh. What do you want to drink?
Six-year-old girl, grabbing bottle of Coke: This one. The good thing is it looks like a beer!
–Deli, 95th & Columbus
Overheard by: Megan W
Crazy woman to mother of laughing baby: He likes me! At least you know he ain't gonna be gay!
–14th St & Ave B
20-something female shopkeeper to coworker, as Michael Jackson's "Rock with You" plays on the radio: Did you hear he's sick? Apparently, he's in the hospital. I know, it's crazy. Can you imagine if he dies? If he dies, that'll be, like, the most awful thing to happen to America in years!
–Pet Food Store
Overheard by: Nathalie
Suit on cell: What if Michael Jackson sucking your dick was the cure for cancer?
–8th & Broadway
Man, lighting cigarette: So what'd he die from? A sunburn?
–Chambers St. & West Broadway
Middle aged black lady on cell: If you can get Michael Jackson on a condom box it would definitely sell.
–MacDougal & 8th St
Nine-year-old boy, pointing to a newspaper article, to younger sister: Oh yeah, that guy? He was fifty. He used to be a black guy but made himself become white.
–Canal & Orchard, Chinatown
Overheard by: Lauren T.
Large tattooed man, discussing Michael Jackson: One of those kids is his; the other two can't be, they're white. They were all unofficially inseminated, though.
–Delancey & Essex
Four-year-old #1 holding out a gummy snack: Is this a Pygmy Marmoset?
Four-year-old #2: That’s a elephant!
Four-year-old #2’s mom: It’s an elephant.
Four-year-old #1: Ugh. I wanted a Pygmy Marmoset.
–Metro-North to Grand Central
Ice cream truck guy to boy on scooter: How are you doing, little man?
Little boy to ice cream guy: How are you doing, faggot?
–Astoria, Queens
Teen: Oh my god! You’re sooo cool.
12-year-old ghetto kid, throwing snappers at him: Fuck you, cracka!
–President St, Park Slope
Overheard by: Lucian
Boy, 7: Who’s that guy again?
Mom: Which one?
Boy, 7: Subway.
Mother: Bernard Goetz.
–B48 bus
Little boy watching fireworks: Ew! You farted!
Little girl watching fireworks: No I didn't!
Little boy watching fireworks: Then what was that sound coming from your butt?
–Hudson River Park & 24th St
Overheard by: Eric Schneider
