Girl: I’ve never had venison before.
Guy: Order it. You can taste Bambi. You can taste the innocence. And the fear.
–“A” Restaurant, Columbus Avenue
Girl: I’ve never had venison before.
Guy: Order it. You can taste Bambi. You can taste the innocence. And the fear.
–“A” Restaurant, Columbus Avenue
Girl: Think you’ll be able to convince your parents to go see a movie or something over Christmas?
Guy: Not a chance. My parents are impossible to motivate to do anything.
Girl: Ah, I bet you could get them to at least try during the holidays.
Guy: I’m not kidding…They are completely exhausted by eating, sleeping, shitting, and working. That’s all they have energy for.
–Tompkins Square Park
Overheard by: BBW
Hobo: I was an extra in the movie [inaudible] Times Square, man! Did you see it? I was the one down on my knees screaming, ‘I’m a born-again porno addict!’
–N train
Man on cell: Yo, dude, I don’t know what to get! They got all kinds of shit in there!
–Outside adult video store, 14th & 6th
Overheard by: Sarah
Hot chick on cell: Why are you so stressed?! This sounds like a good thing! Don’t be so serious about it! It’ll be okay! Here, did you know there’s an animal rights group called ‘Porn Stars for Pups’?
–The Black Sheep
Overheard by: Argopelter
Guy on cell, pushing by couple with baby in stroller: I’m not going to California! I pay her twelve hundred dollars per hour. If she doesn’t sleep with Niko, then fire her! I lost a hundred thirty-eight fucking grand yesterday! Tell her what to do, and deal with it!
–Horatio & Hudson
Overheard by: Stephen Lindsay
Angry girl to friend: Seriously, Chris, can’t we go one day without talking about shizer porn?!
–East Village
Girl #1: He fine.
Girl #2: Who? Anakin?
Girl #1: Yeah.
Girl #2: Finer den Usher?
Girl #1: Nah, nobody finer den Usher.
–The Pavilion, Park Slope
Black guy: Yo, fuck the Jedi. It’s all about the Dark Side. I’m the other Dark Lord you’ve been looking for.
–86th & Lexington
Overheard by: Joshua S.
Girl: Oh my god, all this time I thought I was a Buddhist, but I’m really a Sith.
–UA movie theater, Union Square
Overheard by: Lara Evangelista
Teen #1: What do you think is like the best sports movie ever?
Teen #2: I think The Green Mile.
Teen #3: That ain’t no sports movie, man!
Teen #2: He was runnin’!
Teen #1: I like Rudy.
Teen #2: Naw man, Rudy was a fuckin’ benchwarmer.
Teen #3: Naw, Rudy is all about how the little guy can persevere.
Teen #1: I cried at Rudy.
Teen #3, touching his heart: Yeah, man, Rudy hurts.
–A Train
Overheard by: Brenda
Drunk #1 in video booth: There’s so many movies to choose from!
Drunk #2: I think I’m in a gay booth.
Drunk #1: This one’s from the point of view of a dick!
Disembodied voice: Isn’t everything?
–Peep Show, 8th Ave
Overheard by: just passing through
Tour guide: The school campus has been in many film and television productions, including The Good Shepherd, Law and Order, and most notably the classic Debbie Does Dallas.
Big Midwestern dad: I thought I recognized that library!
–Pratt Institute, Brooklyn
Overheard by: PrattStudent09
Black guy: Two for Akeelah.
German girlfriend: What? What are you buying? Two kilos for what?
Black guy: No. Akeelah.
German girlfriend: I don’t understand. Two kilos of what? That makes no sense.
Black guy, rolling his eyes: No! Akeelah! Akeelah!. Akeelah! Two for Akeelah!
German girlfriend: I still don’t understand.
Black guy: Akeelah and the frickin’ Bee!!!
German girlfriend: OHHHHH!
–Union Square Stadium 14, Broadway & 13th
Older man, to no one in particular: That's why I keep my income low, so no one jumps me.
–Myrtle & Clinton, Brooklyn
Woman with scratch-off lotto card to friend: I won four dollars! I won four dollars! You know I can't spend that, though. I gotta get food for my kids. Those niggas be hungry!
–Staten Island Ferry
Angelic-looking teen girl screaming into cell: Are you coming to the movies with me? You're broke? Just mug someone on the way. Mug someone! (pause) Mug! M-u-g! Rhymes with "thug"!
–Chambers & West St
Puerto Rican dude on cell: I ain't got no money. I got weed, but I ain't got no money.
–25th St & 7th Ave
Village lady: She was in foreclosure before it was fashionable to be in foreclosure.
–Bleecker & Mercer
Suit #1: You know what movie they’re filming over there?
Suit #2: I think it’s a snuff film.
–Maiden & Water
Overheard by: Angry Oscillations
