Guy: Wait, what part of New York is Chicago in?
Girl: What?! Chicago isn’t in New York! Chicago is its own state.
Guy: No, it’s not a state! It’s called the “windy city.”
Girl: Oh, right. I guess it is in New York then.
Guy: Yeah.
Girl: Hang on, I’ll look it up on my blackberry.
–Fordham University
[hobo walks into the train with bag in cart]Drunk queer standing behind hobo: Move it or lose it.
Hobo: Who the fuck is that?!
Queer: Queen Victoria.
Hobo: I’m a marine, I’ll fucking kill you.
Queer: Let me know when you get your VA check, I’ll help you spend it.
Hobo: Yeah, sure I’ll do that.
Queer: In Central Park.
Hobo: I’ll call you.
Queer: My number’s 444-332. Call me at that number.
Hobo: I won’t call you.
[they get off the train giggling]
–A train, Columbus Circle
Overheard by: JohnD
Guy: Is there such a thing as too hi-res?
Girl: Yea, it’s called real life.
–16th St & 5th Ave
Overheard by: John Fischetti
Tourist girl #1: You know that movie Juno? Is it named after “Ju-no”, like, “You know?”…”Ju-no”?
Tourist girl #2: I think it’s her name.
Tourist girl #1: Oh… Ok.
–6 Train
Overheard by: Emily
Brooklyn family court employee: What’s your daughter’s name?
Mother: Chicago.
Brooklyn family court employee: Like the state?
Mother: Yes.
–Brooklyn Family Court
Lead singer of The Stitch Ups: What’s your name, sir?
Audience member: Samantha.
Lead singer of The Stitch Ups: Holy shit!
–Blender Theater, Gramercy
Overheard by: we thought she was a dude, too…
[Heading towards the restaurant “Good”.]Gay guy #1: Where are we going again?
Gay guy #2: It’s “Good”.
Gay guy #1: What’s good?
Gay guy #2: The name of the restaurant we’re going to.
Gay guy #1: I asked you what it was.
Gay guy #3: Oh, we are so not doing this…
–The Village
Loud lady #1: What you gonna name yo baby when she pop out?
Loud lady #2: Merlot.
Loud lady #1: What?!
Loud lady #2: Merlot.
Loud lady #1: Marlin?
Loud lady #2: Merlot. Its a fine wine, dummy. The reason she be comin’ in to dis world.
–1 Train
Overheard by: TylerDavis
Girl: So do you have any kids?
Guy: No, but if I had a daughter I’d name her Kayla.
Girl: I know a Kayla. She’s a fucking crazy bitch.
–West 4th & 6th Ave
Bum walking dog, singing: Tired of looking for love in all the wrong places, ejaculating on all the wrong faces…
–72nd St & Columbus
Overheard by: Asset
Drugged-up guy singing a song to girls on subway platform, to the tune of "Earth Angel": Earth angel, earth angel, would you be mine? Earth angel, earth angel, would someone loan me money so I can bribe her to take me hoooome…
–Union Square Platform
Overheard by: Thankfully not an earth angel
Cop #1, singing to cop #2: Look at me, I’m Sandra Dee..!
–6th Ave & Waverly
Overheard by: Jatmos
Blind panhandler, singing: Can’t take my eyes off of you…
–R Train
Young hobo, singing: Gimme some money, bitch, I need a fuckin’ pen, so I can write a sign…
–St Mark’s Place
Greyhound bus driver: We’re pulling up to Port Authority now. [Sings] My Greyhound brings all the boys to the yard, and they’re like, it’s better than yours, damn right, it’s better than yours, I can teach you, but I have to charge. La la la la la- New York City! La la la la la -almost there.
–Geyhound, Port Authority
Overheard by: carly, gina, and jenna
